Heartbeat
by Mussimm
Summary: She wasn't fooling me. I had seen her turn a square kilometre of forest into firewood. There was nothing modest or sweet about Temari, she was pure destruction disguised by a curvaceous figure and an eloquent tongue. ShikaTem. ShikamaruxTemari
1. Trying Times

**A/N: **Okay, this story is written in alternating perspectives, I'm sure you'll catch on.

No one reads author's notes.

--

"You should spend less time playing shogi and more time training," I informed him over the board.

"Stop talking." He pressed his fingertips together. I smirked. He was a good shogi player, I had to give him that. Not quite so good at making friends. But then, as he had brutally reminded me not much earlier, he had no intention of being my friend. Not that I had asked.

I contemplated him contemplating the board. Two weeks ago was the first time we had been in the same room without the pressure of battle upon us. If we hadn't started out bruising each others' pride we might have been friends. But his dishonorable surrender to me was as unforgivable as my salvage of his mission. Two times that we substituted honorable defeat with shameful victory.

Bruises healed, it was true, but our one upmanship was hardly therapeutic. We knew too well that arrogant words would fall on deaf ears. Our battles were played with action. I supposed it was childish. Trying to prove to each other that our respective humiliation was a one-off, an anomaly, a freak accident.

I turned my attention back to the board. He had moved a piece. I frowned, wishing I had a magic pose that would allow clarity of thought. I tried to predict his next move, but he always seemed to see an opening that I had missed. I thought back to our first battle, two years ago. My bad temper and lack of patience had been my downfall. If I had not thrashed my tessen, trying to smoke him out, I would have noticed what he was doing, would have left myself room to move.

I saw an opening, and was immediately suspicious. Had he left it that was as a trap? _Patience, thought, clarity._ I reminded myself. I looked it over, trying to visualise the board as it would be once I had moved, what he would do next, then what I would do. This was how to bruise the genius' ego.

"Are you going to move anytime soon?" His nonchalant voice distracted me.

"Are you going to shut up anytime soon?" I replied, trying to get my train of thought back.

He didn't flinch. "Just wondering if I could catch a nap."

I shrugged. "It'd make winning easier."

I saw him glance at the board and followed his gaze. I smirked. He hadn't looked at the opening I had seen. The genius had made a mistake.

Before he could reply I moved my piece. He looked down, and a strange look crossed his face, as though he had indigestion. My smile became harder to contain. Shikamaru looked at me like I was from another planet, his eyes wide. I didn't want to ruin the moment by showing him how hard I'd tried for it. So I subdued my grin and shrugged coolly.

"You should pay more attention to the game."

I knew from the narrowing of his eyes that this was my last victory at shogi.

"How troublesome."

--

She had won. I stared at her closely. She wasn't above using genjutsu on me. No, she didn't know any. I had genuinely lost a game of shogi to the sand princess. I had known from our first fight that she was smart, but then I could only predict so much from a single battle.

This hadn't been one of my predictions.

Temari was restraining herself from smiling, her nose buried in a mug of tea. She was slightly flushed from a full stomach, a long conversation and the steam from her tea. It looked pretty on her.

The sun was setting outside, casting long shadows along the ground, bathing her pink and orange. As usual, she didn't seem to notice her surroundings. But I knew that if it was demanded, she'd be able to name every object in the room, and how she could kill me with it.

Her eyes danced on mine, basking in her victory. I wasn't angry, but the fire of anger had just started to simmer in my chest. Only not quite. This wasn't a blind sensation, not any kind of embarrassment or bitterness. More like a need to rise to the challenge. The same fire she had lit in me the first time we had fought, when I was faced with such an impossible person that I had to prove she had flaws. I had underestimated her.

"You got lucky," I told her with a smirk.

"I thought shogi wasn't a game of luck," she taunted.

She was right, she hadn't been lucky, I had been stupid. I was never a sore loser, but I hated to make a mistake.

"Rematch." I started to reset the board.

--

The Sunagakure embassy loomed in front of us. The streets were completely darkened, a few stray candle lights emanated from windowsills. My lips tasted of sweet tea and my sides were tired from laughing. Having Shikamaru as a guide wasn't turning out so badly. Our shoulders occasionally brushed lightly as we walked, I suddenly realised. The distance between us had evaporated.

I stepped away slightly.

A friendship in Konoha was something I knew to be useful. I would be here often enough, there were plenty of missions for an ambassador. The closer I was to this village, the stronger our alliance would become. But there were limits. Different levels of closeness that made the difference between a strengthened tie of villages and a liability.

If I had been honest with him, I would have admitted that his company was appreciated. It wasn't that I was one of those girls that always needed someone around. I spent half of my life trying to get five minutes to myself. But at night, in my rooms at the embassy, it seemed empty. I was used to my brothers being there. After three weeks, I was missing Sunagakure badly. Kankurou should have been acting the fool, I should have been trying to tease a rare smile out of Gaara. It was lonely here.

I bowed to Shikamaru.

"Goodnight, Shikamaru-kun."

"Goodnight, Temari-chan," he yawned. I had decided that chan was not so bad. It would give me a laugh if he became so used to calling me by it that he forgot to revert in front of Gaara.

He turned to walk away. I thought briefly about stopping him, but the request would be too awkward for me to vocalise.

I turned towards the embassy, sighing at the dark tower. The guards bowed to me as I walked through the doors.

I had bigger problems than homesickness. The Chuunin exams were only a few months away. The examination istelf was not a problem, the security was. Dozens of feudal lords would arrive for the event. Konoha nobles as well would come out for the battles. All of them would be abandoning their personal guard, their guarantee of safety, in exchange for the protection of a single ANBU force. More importantly, in my mind, the Kazekage would forego most of his own protection in the same way.

The Konohagakure ANBU would be ample protection against almost any force. But it had not slipped anyone's mind that the Third Hokage had died at the Chuunin exams. The Fourth Kazekage had died around that time, too, though it was a death mourned by significantly fewer.

Gaara had seen me for so long as just a pawn, a grunt, someone to be taken advantage of until I was no longer of use. Though I knew it was foolish, I had always loved him. Feared him, yes, his lack of control over the Ichibi made that necessary, but loved him as my little brother. Now that he loved me back, I would not let anything take that away from me. We were finally a real family.

I sat on my bed, stripping off my stockings and lying back, staring at the ceiling. Hokage had so far refused to let the Sunagakure ANBU occupy the village during the exams. It was the only protection that I would accept. They weren't superior to the Konoha ANBU, but if push came to shove, I know they would protect the Kazekage above all others.

There were rumblings in Kumogakure of breaking their alliance with Suna. The Raikage was tempremental at best, I didn't trust him. If we moved the Kazekage out of his safe zone, it might be tempting an attack.

I frowned, realising I was staring at the ceiling, lost in thought.

Curse that Shikamaru.

--

"This is fine."

The gates of Konoha loomed in front of us, emblazoned with the fire symbol. She hadn't really needed my guidance for this walk, but I felt like walking with her one more time. Something had possessed me to follow this mission through to the very end, even if I didn't need to. I suspected it was her troublesome influence.

She had looked at me when I met her in front of the embassy. A kind of weird, vulnerable look. It wasn't the kind of look that should suit her, but it did.She seemed to slip easily into any role she wanted to play, even that of mildly startled foreign emmissary.

"Catch you around," I had meant to say. "Hate to see you go, but love to watch you leave."

But that's not what really came out.

"The next time I see you will be at the Chuunin exams, right?"

Smooth. She wasn't even gone and I was already thinking of the next time I'd see her. She was sure to fall for such overwhelming suavity. I had enjoyed her company for the last couple of weeks, although I wasn't letting her know that. If she knew, her ego might overflow and kill me.

"Yeah, see you around." She almost smirked as she said the words.

See? That was the kind of cool I was aiming for, and failing to achieve. No big deal.

She started to walk away, but stopped, turning back to me. I raised an eyebrow, hoping she'd say something equally embarrassing.

"You need to hurry up and become a jounin. You should be able to do it quickly if you stop complaining and take your missions seriously."

The only way she could be more like my mother would be to develop a passion for yelling at my father. I rubbed the back of my neck. Just like my mother, she was probably right. Just like my mother, I didn't want to hear it.

Temari flashed me a grin, softening her words. Okay, my mother would never do that. She turned and walked away.

I sighed. "What a pain."

But I still couldn't help myself from watching her until she faded into the horizon.


	2. Foreign Relations

I lay back on my bench and gazed at the clouds. So peaceful.

The Suna nin would be arriving soon, the Chuunin exams would begin in two days. Hokage-sama had agreed that the Sunakagure ANBU be admitted to the village for the Kazekage's protection. I snorted. If Gaara needed protection that he couldn't provide himself, we were all doomed. At least with the sudden jump in numbers for their party, they would be escorted by ANBU instead of me.

There would be no non-emergency missions completed during the exams, so I had some time off. I wondered where Chouji was. He usually joined me to cloud watch. I sighed, turning my thoughts to the wispy monoliths above me. It was nice to simply sit back and not think about anything. People saw my intelligence as a gift, but an overactive mind could be tiring. I enjoyed watching the clouds pass by and thinking of nothing at all.

"Shikamaru-kun!"

_Well, there goes that idea._

"Hey, Naruto-kun."

A grinning blond mug apppeared above me. "Are you excited about the Chuunin exams? I heard you're in charge of security!"

I sighed. "I was only liaising with Suna about security. ANBU are in charge, as always."

"That's still pretty cool."

"I suppose." I dragged my gaze from the sky, knowing it was hopeless to continue my activity.

"Neji was just telling me all about security at the last exams, seems pretty tight. I heard there are going to be Sunagakure ANBU here as well! Imagine someone who is strong enough to protect Gaara!"

I strained my neck forward to see Neji, who looked uncomfortable. I guessed that he was also an unwilling participant in this exchange. I smirked. I didn't mind Neji, but I also didn't mind seeing him so awkward.

"Neji and I were just going to train-" Naruto's words were cut off by an unearthly shriek.

We all froze for a split second. It hadn't come from the village, somewhere in the forest more likely. And it definitely wasn't human.

"Byakugan!" Neji reacted first. My heart skipped a beat as I watched him scanning the forests far beyond our line of sight. He sprang to life. "The Kazekage is under attack."

Neji bounded off the rooftops while Naruto and I tried to keep up. The trees rushed towards us, our feet flying. It used chakra to travel this quickly, but we had to move fast. I knew that we should have informed Hokage Tsunade to call for backup, but something kept my feet moving behind Neji's. I needed to take care of this.

"How many?" I asked calmly.

Neji shook his head. "Maybe 100. The Suna ANBU are already with them, we'll just be backup. They look like Kumo nin."

Kumo? The land of lighting was attacking the land of wind? I frowned. This was a bad sign so close to the exams. A Suna fatality on Konoha lands was a bad sign regardless.

I quickened my pace, I could hear the sounds of battle up ahead.

"Shikamaru!" Naruto roared behind me. I ducked just in time as a familiar rattling sound swooped above my head. One of Kankurou's dead-eyed puppets had barely missed me.

"I hate that sound," I grumbled. Those puppets gave me the creeps. The cat-eared puppeteer stood on a tree branch far above me.

"Sorry about that," he called, voice dripping with sarcasm. My eyes narrowed. I sincerely did not like that man.

We made our way forward, finally seeing the attacking nin. Neji's initial assessment had been right. The clouds on their forehead protectors gave them away as Kumo nin. They fought with Suna ANBU, whose faces weren't covered by masks, instead by thick paint, not unlike Kankurou's. They wore distinctive sand-coloured clothing.

My observations were thrown off by a sudden sidewards gust. I collided with a tree trunk, feeling a rib crack. The air rushed out of my lungs and I struggled to regain my footing. Four or five other bodies had also been thrown tumbling in the tornado. I noticed that Naruto and Neji had been spared. I sighed.

"Out of the way, crybaby!" Three purple suns glared at me, almost as ferociously as the pair of green eyes peering over them. I scrambled to the side, barely missing a blast of sickling wind.

"This was a great idea," I mumbled to Neji. "Looks like we're really turning the tide of the battle."

He glared at me and I rolled my eyes. We made our way forward through the fray, dodging blows occasionally but mostly unnoticed. The Kazekage was standing calmly in the middle of the battle, looking as though he hadn't noticed anything was going on. More painted ANBU members formed the swastika formation around him.

"Gaara!" Naruto called out. "Gaara, are you alright?"

A small smile formed on the redhead's lips. "I'm well, Naruto-san. And you?"

"You cocky idiot!" Naruto roared joyously, before tackling a Kumonin who came too near him.

I sighed, my intial shock at the situation now subsided. I had not thought this through. I should have asked Neji what level the nin were, how well they were fighting, anything. It was stupid to think we could make any difference with ANBU already fighting in full force. I gazed around, looking for something useful to do.

Failing to find anything, I glanced up at Temari. It looked as if she was toying with her prey, tossing non-fatal winds against them repeatedly. I smiled. She was enjoying herself way too much.

She was about to enjoy herself a lot less, I thought, as I noticed one of the Kumonin climbing the tree behind her, kunai in hand. No, she had noticed him... hadn't she? Surely. Her superior smirk didn't move an inch and she fanned her enemies again and again. She never glanced back.

The nin behind her advanced silently, still she showed no sign of having seen him. He raised his kunai, ready to plunge if downwards into her spine. She finally whirled around, her eyes widening as she saw the glint off the knife. She stumbled backwards, but the attack froze midmotion. I smiled. "Shadow possession successful."

Temari grimaced, then shoved a kunai up into his gut, ripping upwards. I looked away as the blood spurted over her. The victim's head turned too, making me frown. How macabre, I should have released him as he died.

"You're welcome," I mumbled to Temari as she tore a fatal blast of air into her enemies, her good humour gone.

The fight was becoming more concentrated. There were one or two ANBU lying montionless, but for the most part the Kumonin were gathered around a pack of them. The swastika around Gaara dispersed to pick off the remaining attackers. The assault was dying off.

Gaara was frowning now, looking over his shoulder. I eyed him cautiously.

"What is it?"

He looked to his other side as I approached him. "Someone is dispersing their chakra. I can't tell where he is."

I frowned. A stealth jutsu. It must be good if it could fool Gaara.

Before I knew what had happened I felt a blinding pain in my side. The blow had come from behind, I had let my guard down. I felt warm blood trickling down my side, I was on the ground. Where was Gaara? The blow had been intended for him, his ANBU weren't there. Would his sand protect him? It'd have to.

I managed to roll over looking up at the Kazekage. He still stood, arms crossed, deathly calm. That was because the blow that had ripped through me had never reached him. The attacker's arm was still extended, but five fingertips had stopped him.

A tall ANBU stood between Gaara and his assailant. She wore a short, sleeveless kimono, a pair of drums strapped to her hip. A tiny canary perched on her shoulder.

The man reeled back as though her touch burned. My vision was becoming blurry, the figures around me seemed like wraiths. I must have been cut deep, this was blood loss. The Kumonin fell to his knees, grasping at his chest, but his eyes tranfixed on the ANBU member.

"Does your heart beat for me?" The voice seemed ethereal and drifting, my dizziness escalating. My heart thumped. No, that had been a drum beat. She had started striking the instruments at her side, slowly. My heart leapt to my throat, seeming to beat in time with her rhythm.

The drum beats started coming faster. My head was spinning now, my body limp. I was helpless against the thundering of my heart. This was bad, my wandering mind told me. The faster my heart pumped, the more blood I would lose. It seemed relentless.

The storm inside my veins was growing more tumultuous, I knew I was about to pass out. I vaguely saw Gaara's attacker undergoing the same shock. But no one else. I was just aware of several figures standing around me.

Soft hands covered my ears, though I couldn't identify their owner. The storm began to subside, my heartbeats less painful. I felt the pain in my side intensify under pressure, someone was trying to stop the bleeding.

I tried to look up at the perverse battle going on above me. I couldn't move my head far enough. But I knew why my ears were covered. That shriek. That scream that had brought us here. It was coming.

When it hit the meager protection I had softened the blow, but I still felt it. I felt my back arch and an involuntary stream of sounds flowed from my mouth. The hands moved from my ears to my shoulders, trying to restrain me. I couldn't think, I couldn't move.

My vision finally tunnelled into sweet blackness.

--

It was bright out. Too bright. I squinted in the light, trying to make sense of my surroundings. It took a few moments for my eyes to adjust, but I soon brought a white ceiling into focus. I wasn't in my room, but I was lying in a soft bed. What happened?

I groaned, remembering what had happened. ANBU had saved Gaara and I had my ass kicked. This must be the hospital. Further examination confirmed this. White walls, white sheets, a large window opened out towards the academy. And I wasn't alone.

"He's awake." A dry voice filled my ears. She seemed impatient. I smirked.

"Temari-chan." Talking was difficult. My side ached, so did my chest. "Come to kiss it better?"

"You wish."

I smiled at the ceiling before straining my neck to see who else was in the room. Asuma-sensei leaned against the wall, next to him... the female ANBU. I frowned.

"What's my status?"

Asuma-sensei stepped forward, smiling slightly. "Five cracked ribs, a nasty gash to the side, and a lot of stress. Your heart was resuscitated at the scene, but you just need some bed rest."

My side felt like it had taken worse than a gash. Though it didn't appear to be gushing blood anymore, which I took as a good sign. Five cracked ribs didn't add up. I might have cracked one against the tree, but five?

"Five ribs?" I asked.

"There were no medical ninja on the field," Asuma explained. "Your chest was crushed by compressions."

"Quit complaining, crybaby," Temari hissed. "You're alive."

Troublesome woman, I hadn't even complained. She was being overly defensive, it made me frown in thought. Something else had happened after I lost consciousness.

The female ANBU stepped forward, bowing to Temari. She adressed her quietly. "Hime-sama, Kazekage-sama is expecting us back, may I speak?"

Temari nodded her approval. My eyebrows raised. As troublesome women went, this one seemed bad. Few of them tried to kill me before introducing themselves.

The ANBU bowed to me. "Nara-san, I came to apologise. My jutsu only works on those I have marked and those who are weak of heart. Had I realised the extent of your injuries, I would have used hand-to-hand combat."

So that's why Gaara's attacker had collapsed, when she had touched him she had left a mark. And why I had been nearly killed, my heart was already working hard from blood loss. But that was battle, she had saved her Kazekage, she didn't need to apologise to a lowly chuunin for endangering him in the process.

"You don't need to apologise," I sighed, looking out the window. "But since you already have, consider it accepted."

"Kanariabuke-chan and I must report to Kazekage," Temari said flippantly, then to me, "Try not to die while we're gone."

I sighed again and waved them away. Kanariabuke, Canary Warrior, a code name. Of course, ANBU couldn't reveal their true identities.

A vase had been placed by my windowsill, housing a purple lily. I wondered who had left it there. Ino would probably have some blinding insight into its meaning. I liked flowers, they were peaceful. All pretty things should be as untroublesome as flowers.

"Don't get too comfortable." The door hadn't swung shut after Temari. One strong arm held it open and I groaned. Women. Tsunade-sama strode into the room. "I heard about your little escapade."

_Here it comes,_ I thought, a lecture on barging into a hostile situation, not calling for backup, not informing her of an act of war in konoha borders, blah blah blah.

"Shikamaru-kun," she said, arms folded. "I never expected this of you. Your actions are always level-headed, well thought out, the safety of your team and yourself at he forefront of your strategies."

She sounded like she was just warming up for a very long rant. I groaned slightly, I had only just woken up. I should have at least had a chance to come to my senses before this kind of barrage.

"Sunagakure ANBU have issued me with a full report on your actions. Your initial discomfort in that battle was to be expected, you were outclassed amongst S-rank ninja, but..." I winced, preparing for the onslaught. She paused a moment and took a breath in. "I honestly never expected you to shield the Kazekage at risk to your own life. It's the fighting spirit that you've lacked for so long. Your actions have avoided a diplomatic nightmare, and salvaged Konoha's reputation."

My jaw dropped. What fight had everyone else been watching? I had been completely lost. I supposed from ANBU's perpective I had approached the Kazekage at during a stealth attack, at the angle it was most likely the attack would come from. It had looked like I was doing exactly as Tsunade had said, acting as a human shield. I couldn't believe my luck. Surely she'd give me a break from my duties for this.

I smirked, lying back in the bed, hands behind my head. A single lapse in judgement and I'd become a diplomatic hero.

"Which is why I'd like to recommend you for the jounin exams. They will be taking place one month after the chuunin exams, you should be healed by then."

I moaned in suffering. I should have seen something like this coming. That wretched woman never gave without first taking away.

My head flopped back onto the pillow, my eyes closing.


	3. Friendly Fire

Fuedal lords were pooring into the stadium. They filled the last seats, brought in last for security reasons. After them would be the Kazakage and the Hokage. Kankurou and I flanked Gaara, Tsunade-sama and her ANBU beside us.

Three years to the day since our father died. None of us shed any tears.

As the final lord took his seat, we led the way to the top of the stadium. Our ANBU stood beside Gaara's chair. Kankarou and I would have to sit with the audience. It irritated me that despite being the security liaison with Konoha, I was not part of the security team for the event.

Sarutobi-sama's death hung over this event now, it had for three years. He was old when he died, but it hadn't escaped anyone that he was still one of the most powerful ninja to live at the time. Some people felt that Suna had no right to feel on edge, as we had perpetrated the atrocity. Our shame at following the false Kazekage's orders had inflamed our aggressive nature. Relations were still tense.

I pushed the thoughts out of my mind, following Kankurou downstairs to spectate.

--

If anyone had told me that jounin candidates were required to watch the chuunin matches, I would have declined Tsunade's offer. Not that the jounin exams were optional. I wasn't even that interested in my own chuunin exam, much less anyone else's. I blamed Neji for this.

Worse still, Naruto was sitting next to me to cheer on his protege, Konohamaru. Which ruined my plan to nap through the majority of the fights. And would probably ruin my hearing as well.

Konohamaru of Konoha vs. Azaki of Suna was the first match.

I couldn't believe that the kid had made it to the chuunin exams as a rookie. It was true that I had become a chuunin as a rookie, but I wasn't following Naruto's example. With Konoha's reputation on the line, I couldn't fathom why Tsunade had allowed it.

The two contenders stepped forward. Konohamaru wore his forehead protector proudly, his brown hair spiked in a too-familiar way. Azaki the Sunanin was taller by a head, with shaggy black hair and an odd posture. At least it should be over quickly.

I felt the emptiness next to me disappear and looked to my left. Kankarou smirked back at me and I frowned. The guy gave me the creeps. Temari sat next to him, eyes already on the competition.

"Begin!" The proctor's declaration fixed my attention back onto the field.

The two opponents didn't move at first. Their voices were too distant to be heard, but I guessed that like our exams, assertions of certain victory were being traded. I smirked. I had heard the speech so many times it had lost all meaning.

Konohamaru was the first to act, charging forward, arms streaming behind. He had kunai in both hands, though everyone knew he would not land a blow. If he was smart he wasn't expecting it, simply testing his opponents defenses.

The kunai were easily parried. Azaki stepped back, swinging his own knife towards the younger genin. Konohamaru spun in the air, dodging the hit and landing on his feet. Not bad. The genin resumed their standoff.

"Go, Konohamaru! You can crush him!" The sudden roar from Naruto startled me. Konohamaru grinned below us.

The Suna took advantage of his momentary distraction, rushing forward, fist outstretched. The punch landed squarely, the tiny body flying backwards with a shocked choke. Konohamaru lay on the ground for a silent moment before crawling to his hands and knees, then raising to his feet. He grinned again.

There was no more staring, Konohamaru attacked in a flurry of fists. Azaki was defending himself, but barely. Getting your opponent on the defense was important, I knew this much. However, it could be a poor strategy against a strong opponent, forcing them to either attack fiercely or be backed into a corner. Against a someone of a superior skill level it was a better idea to attack slowly, making them believe you are incapable of defeating them and using the element of surprise in your attacks.

Konohamaru was hurled across the stadium, the kick still lingering in Azaki's body. Guess I was right. The sunanin didn't waste time, running down his prey. As he bore down on the younger boy, I heard Konohamaru roar out a jutsu, though I couldn't make out his words.

A choke of horrified embarrassment echoed around the stadium as Azaki fell off balance to avoid hitting the beautiful, stark naked brunette in front of him. Oh, the joys of belonging to Konohagakure. In no other village could I have the chance to be this humiliated on someone else's behalf. I felt Temari looking at me, and made sure not to take my eyes off Konohamaru, just to annoy her.

Azaki's face suddenly changed, his calm demeanor cracking. A thunk echoed throughout the arena as he slammed his foot into Konohamaru's side, breaking the jutsu. The sunanin roared in anger, another kick landing. The younger man was still on the ground, now groaning in pain. It looked as if he couldn't get up.

He had infuriated his opponent with cheap tactics while still vulnerable. A bad move. The crowd had fallen silent. A ninja did not hit an opponent who was incapacitated. Azaki should have moved back until Konohamaru could stand.

The older nin started to walk away, Konohamaru still struggling to rise. He reached the midpoint of the arena, and in one swift move turned back toward his opponent and planted his hand into the ground.

Bursting forth from his fingertips came six feet of scale and muscle. Two red crests glistened in the sun. The lizard let out a snarl, jaws gnashing.

What? That was unnecessary, he had Konohamaru beaten. A blow or two to knock him unconscious and the fight was over. This could kill him.

"Konohamaru!" Naruto was on his feet, leaning over the railing. "Proctor, stop the match!"

The proctor ignored him. As long as Konohamaru was still moving, the fight would continue. The konohanin finally managed to clamber to his feet, shoulders slumped, breathing heavy. He smiled up at Naruto.

The dragon charged.

Konohamaru's eyes narrowed.

Enormous jaws snapped in empty air. The lizard roared again, trying to shake off the nin perched on its head, gripping both red crests with all his might. Konohamaru's long wail sounded behind the beast as it tore around the arena, furiously shaking its head.

His arms flexed, and Konohamaru flipped over, now back to back with the creature. Grunting from effort, he released one hand, drawing a kunai in his right hand. With one great swipe, he plunged the knife into the animal's neck and opened his left hand. The lizard's own momentum dragged the kunai in one long gash down its spine, ripping and tearing at the flesh. It slammed into the wall, disappearing in a puff of smoke. Konohamaru flew off sideways.

He never hit the ground.

A kick from Azaki kept him in the air, straight under his chin. A punch landed in his stomach as he descended again, a sickening crack filling the air. Then a twisting kick to his back tossed him up again. Another punch, another kick, another punch.

I wasn't sure which blow rendered him unconscious, but I was sure that it happened long before the assault was over. Konohamaru's motionless body finally hit the ground, blood pooring from his mouth and nose, his arm twisted at an odd angle.

No one cheered as the winner was announced, no one made a sound. Naruto's breath caught in his throat, coming up as a kind of gurgling sound. I looked at him, and his expression was one of horror.

Azaki walked from the arena with a satisfied smile on his face.

I looked to my left. Kankurou and Temari shared a smirk.

--

Most of the crowd had left for the night. More battles would continue the next day, but the sun was setting and the feudal lords needed their beauty sleep. I would be following suit as soon as the hokage had my report on security conditions in the spectator stands.

I wandered down the dim stone hallways toward the upper spectator's area. A heard footsteps approaching from the opposite direction. Light hit her sandy hair first and I smirked, stopping in front of her.

"I see you enjoyed the fights today," I said, a hint of sarcasm in my voice.

She smirked right back at me, flaring up a spark of anger that I hadn't realised was there.

"Sunagakure's nin fought well," she replied, almost diplomatically.

I didn't really know why a bitterness started in my chest.

"You must be so proud to have nin who can beat incapacitated opponents into a pulp." It came out in my voice, surprising me, and her, judging by the slight raise in her eyebrows.

"You're upset about the little boy's fight? How unusual for you, Shikamaru-kun."

It wasn't that I cared about Konohamaru, he was Naruto's pet project, not mine. I wouldn't have noticed if he was kidnapped. It wasn't even the brutality of the attack.

"A match between allies should be respectful."

The more I thought about it, the more I found that it wasn't anything about the fight that was angering me.

"He accepted victory without killing the kid. What more do you want?"

It was that she had liked it.

She quirked an eyebrow, looking suddenly prettier in the low light. Painful woman.

I took a step closer, "You're a troublesome woman, Temari-chan."

"And you're a fool, Shikamaru-kun," she said, meeting my step.

The words only stoked my anger. I wanted to walk away, this was too much trouble. Even if I could convince her that the victory was dishonorable, then what? The perpetrator would still become a chuunin, the mission requests would still flock into Sunagakure, people wanting a nin who could do a job thouroughly.

But something in me wouldn't let me turn away. The look on Naruto's face, like he hadn't realised this could happen to Konohamaru. Like I had felt about Chouji before I sent him against Orochimaru's henchman.

That kind of realisation should come for a reason, protecting something you care about. Not in a match between friendly villages.

I grimaced. "You should be ashamed."

Her light expression turned foul, brow creasing, lips turning down. "You should learn to deal with reality."

The playful trading of insults that usually flew between us was nowhere to be seen. This was the real thing, and I had never flinched in the face of Temari.

"Suna has enough bad reputation at these exams, tell your genins not to overstep their mark on our territory," I snarled to her. I didn't care what friendship we had dabbled in, this was home to myself and my friends. Their debt to us was not yet repaid.

The hit came suddenly, the butt of her tessen slamming into my chest, pinning me to the wall. She took a step closer. Her snarl was clear this time, teeth bared. She traded her fan for her fist, pressing against my sore ribs. I grunted with pain.

Her nose nearly brushed mine as she leaned in, I could hear her breathing quicken. "I lost my father in that attack. Don't talk to me about my reputation. Konoha oversteps its boundaries."

She wanted to humble me. She wanted to tell me how wrong I was about her and her village. But I knew that she'd welcomed her father's death. That wasn't the reason those memories smarted. Suna had been fooled, and made to look like warmongers. She was ashamed.

Her body was half an inch from mine, growling in my face. "That boy chose to take the exams, knowing, just as you and I did, that his opponent intended to kill him. He suffered no worse than any other here."

She was right. If Konohamaru was afraid of a beating, he wasn't even fit to be a ninja, let alone a chuunin. If any other opponent had inflicted that beating I would not have cared. If any other village had supplied the victim I would not have cared either.

But I wasn't about to let her know that.

My jutsu was quick, and I smirked at the mild shock that crossed her face. Her fist lowered under my shadow possession, the pain in my ribs easing. Her face calmed, she knew that she was caught and didn't fight it. She just looked at me, proud as always. I sidestepped and turned, swapping our positions.

I raised our hands and instantly released, capturing both her wrists and pinning her to the wall. My usually placid temper and pride were fuelled by her proximity. I leaned in as close as she had been to me, grimacing at her superior smirk.

I paused, feeling her breath against my face, staying perfectly still just long enough to make that horible twist of her mouth quirk with uncertainty. Satisfied, I leaned even further forward so that my lips were hovering over her ear.

"You will be the death of me, Temari-chan."

The pulse in her wrists quickened. Her hands turned as if she was trying to stop herself struggling in my grasp. My eyes narrowed. She wasn't the only one who could be sadistic.

"Temari."

I leapt backward at the icy cold voice. Gaara stood in the centre of the hallway. Kankurou stood at his side, with two ANBU. He looked at his sister quizzically.

"Are you in need of assistance?"

She turned a deep scarlet and pushed herself off the wall, gathering her tessen.

"Let it go, Gaara," she walked calmly past him, continuing up the hallway.

"Are you sure, Temari...chan?"

Kankurou sniggered and Temari paused mid-step, but kept walking. Gaara turned his eyes to me, with a polite, almost entertained look on his face. I didn't buy it for a second. He just found me with his sister up against a wall, I would have misinterpretted it, too.

But now, I finally felt calm. I bowed to him, and kept my head down as he and his entourage continued down the hallway.


	4. Lazy Days

_My hands were tangled in his hair, my touch light._

_I was balancing on one knee, my other leg wrapped around his hips._

_My hands moved, running down his chest, our lips met briefly, roughly._

"_Wake up."_

--

My eyes opened to greet the morning light.

The best thing about Konohagakure was the sleep. In Suna everyone was rushed to get up early. Partly because laziness was considered to be the worst trait a ninja could posses, partly because the harsh climate left only a few hours in the morning between the freezing cold of night and the blistering heat of day.

Not here, though. In Konoha the temperate weather lasted all day, the relaxed air of the village making the days seem hazy, running together, one after the other. And it was something that I had discovered about myself on my missions to this village: I really liked sleep.

We only had another two days in the village, Gaara and Hokage had been involved in furious talks for two weeks since the exams. There had been several incidents in town between sunanin and konohanin, the predicted results of Azaki's little stunt with the Third's grandson. The alliance was growing increasingly unstable, and with the jounin exams commencing so soon.

The jounin candidates had been informed they would be starting in two weeks. A survival training mission, just like a real jounin. The exams changed every year. Shikamaru had tried to weasel information out of me, but even if I had not taken the same oath of secrecy as the other jounins, there was nothing useful to say. His mission would not resemble mine.

I sat up in bed, my hair mussed against the side of my face. He'd be here to escort me to the Hokage's office soon. Things had become confusing between us recently. I stood up and started to dress.

Kankurou had still not let me live down the incident in the hallway. I had never seen Shikamaru like that before. He was genuinely angry that I didn't care about the little boy. Why should I? He was just a chuunin candidate, not a very good one at that. The victory wasn't exactly one for the history books, but it was a victory for our village. Azaki let his temper get the better of him, but really, most chuunin candidates in our first exam had not been let off so lightly.

But Shikamaru didn't see it that way. Someone from _my_ village was rude to someone from _his_ village and I didn't kick up a stink over it, therefore I'm just a heartless Suna bitch. It was an attitude I was used to, but not from him.

I tied my obi around my waist, checking myself in the mirror briefly. Respectable enough. I tied my hair up quickly and started out the door.

He was already waiting for me in the hall downstairs. His face was stony. All warmth had fled from him since that day. "You're late."

"I overslept," I announced, a little proud of the fact.

"Whatever," he sighed. "Let's get going."

I slipped out the door behind him and took up my usual place at his side. He made no attempt to talk to me and I frowned in frustration. He could only sulk for so long.

"Play shogi with me tonight." I didn't look at him as I made the demand. He was always looking for a game of shogi, and almost everyone had stopped playing with him since they couldn't win. "I'll go easy on you."

He almost smiled. "I'm busy."

I snorted. "No you're not."

"How do you know?" he asked, eyebrow raised, a hint of laughter returning to his dry voice. "Been following me?"

"I don't need to follow you to know that you have no plans," I jabbed. "Play shogi with me."

"Why do you care if I play shogi with you? You don't even like it that much." He stopped walking, turning to face me. He looked frustrated and suspicious.

I smiled at him. "You've been sulking for two weeks, now. That's excessive even for you. We had a disagreement, I didn't murder someone."

He let out a _hmph_. I frowned as he walked away, continuing toward the hokage's office.

"7pm then, I should be finished with my missions for the day."

I smiled and ran a couple of steps to catch up.

--

The tea house next to the academy was my favourite place to play shogi. Asuma-sensei and I had played there many times. It was one thing I liked about him, that he could play and lose again and again and never lose interest, never decide to stop playing with me.

She was already there, waiting for me. Her tessen was leaning against the wall, her knees bent under her. She sipped at her tea.

I sat opposite her without greeting. She smiled at me.

I almost laughed, "If you keep looking so nice, people will mistake you for a lady."

She smirked, taking another graceful sip. "Did you think Konoha kunoichi were the only ones to undertake femininity training?"

This time I started chuckling, thinking of all the things Ino and Sakura could do. "You can arrange flowers?"

"Yes," she nodded, a devilish look in her eye. "On one mission I was even required to _cook_."

I let out a barking laugh, imagining Temari in an apron. She smiled, like she couldn't believe it herself. I took a swig of the tea that was waiting for me and she took the liberty of the first move in our shogi game.

"Did anyone die from eating it?" I prodded her, taking my own move quickly. She never changed her opening moves, so the first few would go quickly.

"Surprisingly, no." She shrugged. "So if you ever need some questionable, unseasoned ramen, mine is non-toxic."

I laughed this time. I looked up at her and suddenly felt awkward. We had played shogi here a dozen times, but she had never smiled at me like that. It was obvious that she was trying to win me over about the chuunin fight. I couldn't see why she cared. Sure, it was nice to sit here, drink tea, make jokes, but neither of us were going to compromise our morals or pride to keep doing it.

She looked so modest and sweet, sitting there, contemplating her next move. She wasn't fooling me. I had seen her turn a square kilometre of forest into firewood. There was nothing modest or sweet about Temari, she was pure destruction disguised by a curvaceous figure and an eloquent tongue.

Still, no one else made me laugh like her.

Her next move had deviated from her usual strategy and I frowned at the board, thinking about my own move.

She laughed gently. "Has the idea of my homemaking skills shocked you into silence?"

I looked up at her. She knew I wasn't just contemplating the game, she could read me too well.

"Yes," I replied. I surprised myself by meeting her smile with my own.

--

The sun had long since set, it was getting close to midnight. Our laughter still echoed through the tea house. We were on our fourth game of shogi, our fifth pot of tea, and at least our tenth story.

She fought to talk through her own laughter, recounting a tale from her last mission to the Mist village.

"So the guy looks up at me," she wheezed, "Looking like I'd just broken his heart, and says, 'You're a ninja? But I already paid for admission!'"

My laughter roared out, I had tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. I laughed so rarely. She didn't laugh much either. And never like this. I had even lost a match to her, so distracted by our conversation. She seemed... relaxed. It was a nice thing to see.

Our breathing slowly returned to normal and she smiled across the table at me. "It's late, shall we have one more cup of tea and call it a night? You're going to end the game with your next move anyway."

So she had seen that coming. She poured two more teas as I studied the board. My strategy had worked, as it usually did. I accepted the cup from her.

"We'll call this one a draw," I looked away from her. "A man should let a woman win."

Her eyes narrowed at me playfully, but she didn't question me. I took a sip of my tea.

"Why did you insist on coming out with me tonight, Temari-chan? You have other things to do in this village now. You don't need to be here."

"Well, I was talking to Gaara..." She looked around. "Finish your tea, I'll tell you my story on the way home."

I sighed, she never made it easy. Gulping down my drink, I stood up and offered her a hand. She took it, collecting her tessen before walking out with me. The night was warm, I liked these nights, I could lay on my bench and look up at the stars.

"So I was talking to Gaara," she continued, stepping a little closer to me. "And he informed me that we had a new objective. It wasn't really surprising, but I thought spending some time with you would be a good way to get us started."

I wasn't really listening. My head was feeling fuzzy. I hadn't been getting enough sleep. My legs felt heavy as I tried to keep up with her. Her words finally registered.

"Kazekage-sama ordered you to play shogi with me?"

She smirked, "No, that part was my idea."

I stumbled. My body didn't seem to be responding properly. Temari didn't react, but stepped over to support my weight. I leaned on her too heavily. What was she talking about? My eyes felt heavy.

"The drugs I slipped into your tea," she continued conversationally, "were Gaara's idea."

I tried to speak but couldn't, now she was the only thing holding me upright. This was the second time I'd been knocked unconscious in two weeks.

--

My eyes drifted open lazily. My neck was stiff. I couldn't move my hands. What? I scanned the room groggily. A cell. My memory from the previous night rushed back to me. Temari. She had drugged me. Why?

I looked around the cell, trying to find anything to tell me where I was, or that might help me escape. The lock on my handcuffs would be easy enough to pick, but there were no windows, not even barred ones, and I didn't know what was behind the only door.

There was all kinds of protocol to go with this situation. I had to scout as best I could, find out their numbers, find any other Konoha prisoners, recover evidence of Suna treachery. That was if I could even get out of the room.

The door handle turned and I looked up. Two long, slinky legs stepped into my field of vision. I knew who they belonged to, and refused to look up.

"I'm sorry, Shikamaru," she said, not sounding sorry at all. "The orders came down yesterday. As soon as we have enough information and leverage on Konoha, the alliance is over. Kazekage's orders. As the Konoha security liaison, we'll need to know what you know."

"You know I won't talk," I muttered.

"Not yet," her cruel streak blazed as she sniggered. "But we'll... convince you."

So this was my fate. To be imprisoned and tortured by this painful, troublesome woman. I thought of that smile she had offered me over tea. She had been too warm, too open, I should have known something was wrong. I just should have known it.

She leaned down and smiled at me. It reminded me of Orochimaru's smiled, hollow and cruel. "Don't take it too personally, I really did enjoy playing shogi with you."

Such a pretty face. She had me right where she wanted me with that smile, that laugh, those hips and legs and mouth. I would never have suspected here. There was a tightness in my chest as she turned and walked away.

"Fucking bitch," I hissed after her.

The door clicked shut.


	5. Daring Escapes

_My hands were tangled in his hair, my touch light. I held his body against mine, my face buried in his neck._

_I was balancing on one knee, my other leg wrapped around his hips. Our position was about tightness, pressure, closeness. I could hear his desperate heartbeat._

_He rolled over. I straddled him, momentarily laying my head against his chest. My hands moved, running down his chest, his shirt torn under my frantic touch. His eyes were closed as our lips met briefly, roughly._

"_Wake up..."_

--

I formed the seals above my head, reaching my shadows into the locks around my wrists. Influencing physical objects without imitation was difficult, I could only move the tiniest of weights but it was enough. The handcuffs fell off with a _click_.

I rubbed my sore wrists. From the ache in my shoulders I had been chained there for at least a few hours. Temari must have taken me from the tea house to the embassy, the embassy to this place. It didn't tell me much. We might have travelled for days before reaching this place. I couldn't tell how long I'd been out, or anything about my location. But she had said that the order had come down yesterday, so it couldn't have been longer than 24 hours since she... she...

I frowned at the dull pain forming in my chest. She had betrayed me. It shouldn't have hurt so much. It wasn't as if we were friends. Not really. She was the ambassador, and I was her guide. That was it. I hadn't needed to spend so much time with her, but then, she was the one who told me to take my missions seriously. So I had taken her advice, big deal.

I pushed the thoughts aside, they weren't lessening the hurt and I needed to stay focussed. There was protocol to be followed here. First: assess the situation. Second: Obtain evidence of Suna treachery and any battle plans. Third: Attempt to rescue any other prisoners. Fourth: Discover the location of the base and find a way back to Konoha.

It wouldn't go down exactly like that, I knew. I crouched against the wall, pressing my fingertips together. The most dangerous thing I'd do would be to open the door in front of me. I had no way of seeing what was on the other side. If there were posted guards I'd have to overwhelm them before continuing. If there were a dozen guards in the hallway I was in trouble. If there was a single ANBU I was in trouble.

Once outside I would have to determine if it was night or day. The Kazekage was now inflicted like the rest of us with the need to sleep. It worked in my favour. I stood no chance of accessing any kind of document with Gaara anywhere. If Temari was here, he would be too.

If it was daytime the best strategy would be to find other prisoners, if there were any, and collaborate on a strategy for escape. There was no point forming a plan without knowing if there was anyone to aid or hinder him, and what abilities they possessed.

I was half-tempted to see if I could just break through the wall, maybe it led to the outside world, although the lack of windows made that unlikely. And I had protocol to follow. It was just so troublesome.

Part of me had accepted that I probably wouldn't make it out alive. And all thanks to one, troubled, troublesome, hypnotising kunoichi. Enough baggage to take a three week holiday, the urge to turn whatever bothers her into an untroublesome pulp, a steel wall around her without a single chink to work on, I should have stayed away.

I grunted, forcing myself to stop thinking of her. This was what got me into trouble in the first place. I had to get through that door.

First the lock. My shadow jutsu did the trick, the click of the lock signalling my success. I frowned. Did they know I could do that? I hadn't ever used the jutsu in front of a sand nin. I hadn't used it in front of any leaf nin, either, aside from Asuma-sensei and my parents. If they knew, it was a trap. If they didn't, I had a stroke of luck.

I backed away from the door, but my shadow shot forward. I fished to the left of the door, hoping for the two guard scenario. I snagged someone, and instantly turned to my right, throwing punches and kicks wildly into the air a few feet away. One of my hands covered my mouth, making sure that the guard I had grabbed couldn't inform his companion of the situation. I heard the scuffle, the shouts of surprise.

I listened carefully to the sounds, still fighting my imaginary opponent. If more than one person responded I was prepared to leap back into my handcuffs and feign innocence. But only one voice was yelling. Two guards, just as I'd hoped.

My shadow receded, my target had been knocked unconscious. Just as I'd hoped. I reached out again, this time grabbing the other. My shadow strangulation went to work quickly. I cut off the blood supply to his brain and he dropped in a few seconds.

I let out a sigh. That went surprisingly well.

Opening the door a crack, I scanned the hallway. Empty. There were two more doors in the hall. No guards. So they were either empty or the occupants were unconscious as I had been. I dragged the two unconscious guards into the cell, wshing I had something to bind and gag them with. I settled for taking their keys, intending to lock them in. I started toward the door.

The sound of shuffling footsteps and clinking chains made me retreat, keeping the door open just a fraction. Two guards rounded the corner. Between them a figure walked, hands bound together, a chain strung between his ankles. Konohamaru.

So this was the leverage part of their plan. The outrage amongst the villagers at his beating had probably shown the sand how much everyone valued the last heir to the Third's legacy.

So low. So fucking low. My teeth ground together as I watched the young boy led toward me, head hanging. Had they tortured him already? No, he didn't know anything.

With a snarl I stretched my shadow, capturing the two guards. The let out gasps of surprise, their hands releasing Konohamaru at my request. The genin looked up, his head whipping around, looking for his saviour.

"Konohamaru-kun, quit wasting time," I growled. His eyes landed on me and he grinned. The same stupid, bright grin that Naruto owned.

"Shikamaru-nii-san!"

I hated that. Everyone was a big brother or sister to this kid. His grin not faultering, he slammed his fist into first one face, then the next. The two guards fell.

It was quicker to undo his cuffs with my shadows than trying to find the right key. He rubbed his wrists as I dragged the two guards to join my own victims. At least I had one ally. From his chuunin fight I knew he wasn't the worst person to have on my side. And he had probably been awake longer than me, he might have seen something to help.

"Have you seen anymore prisoners?" I asked, hauling him into the room and closing the door. We could stay here to collaborate for a few minutes without being bothered.

He shook his head. "We're the only ones. I heard Temari-sama and Kankurou-sama saying that the other prisoners are ANBU, being held at a 'more secure site'."

He emphasised his words with bunny ears in the air.

"Don't call them that," I grouched. "They're traitors."

At least that told me something. This was probably a small facility, low security. More likely a diplomatic outpost than an actual prison. If that was the case, it was very good. Not only would this area be relatively free of guards, but it was likely that there would be the appropriate documents to prove Suna's treachery on site.

I supposed that I deserved a bit of luck after this. Not that people ever really got what they deserved.

The small window in the hallway had revealed a setting sun. It was summer, so the sun would set very late. It was possible that Gaara was asleep and not in his office. Another hour of waiting would be safer. If we were caught by a guard we would be recaptured. Caught by Gaara sneaking into his office... most certainly killed.

I looked down at Konohamaru, who looked concerned and confused. I knew the feeling. At least he wasn't exactly like Naruto, who would have assumed that with the guards gone we would freely walk away. But his expression wasn't what caught my eye, it was his long scarf.

--

The guards safely tied and gagged inside the room had bought us some time.

"You're good at tranformation and cloning, aren't you?" I asked the younger boy. He nodded and my plan formed quickly. After escorting Konohamaru to his cell, the two guards would probably have been changed out to make a report to one of their superiors. So their faces would not be unexpected wandering around a more administrative area.

Also, the guards on a rookie genin's room were probably not the brightest sparks, and would hopefully assume their counterparts had already left to make the report. If they'd been stuck on a tiny post outside their city, they couldn't be exactly top notch.

The main thing to worry about was Gaara's ANBU complement. Two dozen had accompanied him to the exams, and after Kumogakure's attack, they were probably still with him. Kankurou and Temari would be asleep with Gaara. Spoiled Hime-sama, I sneered.

I requested him transformation and began my own. Now all we had to do was find our way to Gaara's office, maybe offer some kind of human sacrifice to a shinigami, and we might have some success. I looked at my now tall partner, trying to memorise his face so that I didn't mistake him for another guard.

We couldn't speak past this point, our voices could give us away, so I led the way. The corridor came to a T intersection at the end, one path darkened, one with a light at the far end. Either the light area was the administrative area and the darkened path led toward the barracks and a sleeping sand golem, or the dark path led to an office abandoned for the night and the light path led to the night watch over the barracks and a sleeping sand golem. Tough choice.

I looked over to Konohamaru, hoping to convey to him my need for information. He seemed to get the point, as he gestured down the darkened hallway then drew a finger across his throat. I nodded to him and led the way up the well-lit path.

If the Hokage's building was anything to go by, the Kazekage's office would be near the outer edge of the building, and at least two blocks away from any central administrative area, to avoid noise. I stopped walking, closing my eyes. I focussed on the chakra surrounding me, trying to guess where I was in the building.

There were at least five people up ahead, maybe 50 metres. To my left I could feel a smaller number, scattered, maybe three. To my right they seemed to multiply, another ten or so, even further apart. The cluster of people were probably central administration, which would be close to the front of the building. The few people on my left probably guards on front offices. So that left the right side of the building. Gaara's office would be back there. At least the building was only one storey.

A very small outpost. It would have to have considerable strategic value to exist at all.

I dragged Konohamaru to the right, down a long hallway. Four guards stared straight ahead. My heart beat quickened, but they didn't flinch. Our cover was working. I tried to predict the turns to the right office. If it was guarded we'd have to take the guards down in complete silence to avoid raising the alarm.

This transformation was eating up my chakra, little by little, and probably a greater strain on my young companion. We didn't have much time. All I could do was imagine the turns I could see Gaara taking. They wouldn't obscure his office, it would be too much trouble for him to get there each day. But it wouldn't be out in the open either, or he'd be subject to too many distractions.

One more left, I thought, and my guesses rewarded me with a large, wooden door, bigger than any of the others. I looked left and right, the hallway was deserted. The locks on the doors were probably so strong that it didn't need guards. Many nin had lockpicking techniques, but the defenses against infiltration were token at best. More to stop the lost and the curious than any actual attempt. That suggested they were somewhere remote. And somewhere rarely used.

With a final look around, I slid my shadow into the lock, which yielded immediately. The door creaked open and I checked over my shoulder, hoping no one had heard.

The room inside was darkened. I let my transformation drop as I re-locked the door. A large desk loomed in front of us. Two bookshelves lined the left wall.

I did a mental checklist of the information I needed to retrieve. Any documents concerning mobilisation of forces. Correspondence between Gaara and the council. Treaty information. Invasion tactics. Maps.

Konohamaru has started for me, yanking a pile of letters out of the bookcase. I began searching the desk. A couple of scrolls looked relevant. I pulled them out and spread them on the desk. I frowned. No information was appearing for me, there was a seal. I tried a few basic techniques to unseal the information, but nothing became apparent. I didn't waste anymore time, we needed to be quick and the Konohagakure cryptologists could unlock them.

The second draw yielded my map and I breathed a sigh of relief. Our position was marked, maybe half a day west of Konohagakure. So my time estimations had been correct.

The third draw had a strange black mark on it. A trap. I didn't recognise the markings. I paused, considering my course of action. The draw with the most security likely held the most important information. It could be vital to Konoha's defense in an attack. But if I failed to disable the trap it would either destroy the information or me. I could try and hope it worked, but some traps were triggered by even the attempt to disable them. If I tried and failed, Konoha would never get the information I had collected, and be completely unprepared for the invasion.

I decided against the attempt, instead shuffling through the files on his desk. Chuunin exam results, some finance documents, nothing relevant.

I called to Konohamaru, it was time to leave, all our objectives had been achieved. Now we just had to get out of the building.

"So what's the plan?" he asked, the worried look once again etched on his face.

"Simple." I took a deep breath. "We're going to say that we're relieving the night watch, and walk out the front door."

_--_

I breathed out a sigh of relief, now a good distance from the building. It had worked, somehow I knew it would. This whole situation felt off.

"This is bull," I said to Konohamaru.

He looked up at me with wide, innocent eyes, "What do you mean, Shikamaru-kun?"

I looked around, rubbing the back of my neck. "That was too easy."

He didn't say anything and I glanced back at our prison. The threats of torture and invasion had seemed so pressing at the time, but now it felt hollow. It was as if it was all a carefully laid out trap to put me in this exact position.

"Political prisoners guarded by flunkies, Gaara's office unguarded, no one questioning their guards roster," I sighed again, trying to think. "Where were the ANBU? Gaara wouldn't travel here without at least a few of them. And he wouldn't keep important prisoners in such low security conditions."

I looked up at the horizon. The sun was finally down, the last few rays stretching our shadows. It had taken maybe half an hour to stage our escape. I had been focussed on speed, but it was still too quick. I started walking toward the sunset. West, that was our goal.

"We're being set up," I said as I walked. "This isn't over yet. Keep your eyes open."

He nodded and we quickened our pace.

--

The trees whirled past us, we were almost flying. The night had well and truly fallen, it felt like we had been running for hours.

I was beginning to have my doubts about the trap, we weren't being followed. There was nothing in the trees except birds. I didn't slow down. Suna ANBU had almost killed me once, I wans't going to risk them catching up to us.

I felt a strange sadness at leaving the base. The next time I would see Temari would be on the battlefield, that much I knew. And it was always so troublesome to fight her. That fan did scare me.

"Shikamaru-kun, look!" Konohamaru's voice had a hint of panic in it and I followed the finger he was pointing.

A single figure stood up ahead, perched on a tree branch. Even from here, black eyes pierced me. Long black plaits fell down her back, her short kimono drifting lightly in the breeze. I swallowed hard.

"Take these," I shoved the precious scrolls into Konohamaru's hands. "Run as fast as you can, you can make it by morning. I'll buy you some time."

His eyes widened but he didn't protest. We had to get that information to Konoha, that was more important than either of us.

We rushed toward Kanariabuke, I drew my kunai, heading straight for her. Konohamaru took a path slightly to the right. Her face was impassive as I ran directly at her.

Her hands caught both of my wrists, trapping me.

"Now, Konohamaru!" I yelled. He shot forward. The ANBU went to follow, but stopped.

_Shadow possession successful, _I thought with a smirk. She stayed trapped for a few seconds, not moving. Her face wans't angry or frustrated. She reminded me of Gaara, perfectly calm.

"I'll finish you quickly, and then stop him," she informed me softly.

Suddenly I was launched backwards. She had broken my shadow possession easily. I fell to the ground, landing in a crouch. I looked up at her.

Just in time, I leapt backward. I needed to keep my distance. I remembered that five fingertip seal, once it was on me, I was finished. Distance fights were not my forte, I frowned.

Her movements were fast, I was stumbling backwards, dodging blow after blow. She had me on the defensive. Without my shadow attacks, my limited taijutsu was all that was keeping me going.

I didn't have time to think, for now I would simply have to react. If she let up I could retreat and think, but this fight was about time. I needed to buy Konohamaru as much as possible. At this rate I would buy him next to nothing. She would overpower me, mark me and kill me, then quickly catch him.

I growled, launching forward. I caught both her elbows in my tackle, pinning her arms against the ground. Dumb tactic, I was fighting like Naruto. Only I didn't have a demon fox to bail me out when it all went to hell.

I felt her knee against my crotch and she launched me over her head. I landed on my back, groaning in pain. What I wouldn't give for a demon fox right about now.

I looked up at the stars and she pressed a hand into my chest. The mark burned, made my chest feel weak and my stomach turn. Maybe Konohamaru would be able to avoid her. Maybe Konoha would get the information and prepare. I looked up at the stars, hoping that I had bought enough time with my tackle. The few extra steps that would get him inside the village before her.

"Does your heart beat for me?"

So this was it. As the drum beat started, I looked at her. I could only hope my death would be worth it for Konoha. There wasn't much else left for me, at least I'd given my friends a fighting chance.

The rhythm became painfully fast. This was worse than the last time. There were knives surrounding my heart, stabbing again and again with every beat. The thumping echoed in my temples, it was too fast, my heart was about to give out.

The canary on her shoulder chirped happily, preparing to scream. I closed my eyes, trying to lose myself in the pain.

The canary let out a strangled squawk and I opened my eyes. That wasn't right.

One strong hand held a pulp of crushed bird.


	6. Ulterior Motives

_My hands were tangled in his hair, my touch light. I held his body against mine, my face buried in his neck. His heart was weak, Kanariabuke's final attack would kill him if I didn't shield his ears._

_I was balancing on one knee, my other leg wrapped around his hips. Both hands occupied, the only way to stop the bleeding in his side was to cram my knee against the wound, hoping to stay the bloodflow. Our position was about tightness, pressure, protection. I could hear his desperate heartbeat._

_The screech rocked my body, but did worse to him, he spasmed and yelled, then lay still._

_He rolled over under my hands, and I felt a moment of panic. I straddled him, momentarily laying my head against his chest, trying to hear his heartbeat. Nothing._

_My hands moved, running down his chest, starting compressions. His shirt tore under my frantic touch, trying to keep his heart pumping. His eyes were closed as our lips met briefly, roughly, lifesaving air pushed into his lungs._

"_Wake up..." I begged, panic driving my hands harder until I heard his ribs crack. "Shikamaru, wake up!"_

--

I wiped the clump of goo in my hand onto the grass.

Kanariabuke looked at me, horrified. It had taken her a very long time to train that bird. I smirked. She should have spent some time thinking about who she was using it against.

"What are you doing?" I demanded. "Our orders are to capture, not kill."

She bowed to me, regaining her composure. "Hime-sama, Kazekage-sama issued me different orders."

She held out a scroll and I looked at it. This wasn't a mission scroll, this was a letter. A rather... personal letter. I read it, my eyes falling on the last line.

_When the time comes, do what needs to be done to keep Nara Shikamaru away from Temari._

Anger flared in my chest. That day in the hallway he had thought we were... And now sending his assassin after Shikamaru. This was rash. What's worse, it was invasive. Even if I felt the need to make passionate love to Shikamaru in a hallway, he would have no right to do anything about it.

"This order is ambiguous," I hissed. "Killing him is not part of our plan."

She bowed again. "Yes, but his death is the most efficient accomplishment of the Kazekage's orders."

"Go home, Kanariabuke," I growled at her, my fist crumpling the letter in anger. "I will complete the capture."

She took a step toward me. "I cannot comply."

"Did you hear me?" I stared her down. Her dead eyes looked back at me impassively. "Go back to the base."

"The Kazekage's orders are top priority. Your emotional attachment is exactly why this order was given."

I looked down at Shikamaru, who had clambered to his knees. His eyes were fixed on mine, a look of shock and hurt on his face. My heart thumped, this was defying Gaara's orders. But I couldn't let him die.

"I will walk away if you choose it," Kanariabuke continued. "But I have already marked him."

My eyes widened, remembering the hitch of her jutsu. His heart wasn't beating without her drum. He was going to suffocate while still breathing. My chest tightened, even if I could beat an S-rank ninja, I couldn't do it before he died. The brain could survive three minutes without oxygen, we had been talking for thirty seconds. The seal lasted ten minutes.

"Beat your drum, Shiota." Screw protocol, I used her name, her real name. She needed to beat that drum, _now._ "Do it or I will make you."

"Hime-sama, I will not hurt you if I don't have to, but Kazekage-sama's orders are still first priority." Her fingers rested lightly on the drum, but didn't move.

I drew my tessen from my back, taking up a battle stance. I had no idea how I was going to keep his heart beating while we were fighting, but I had to try something. "You have misinterpretted your orders. I will fight for the Kazekage's intentions."

_Fucking bitch..._ The words still rang in my ears. I had hurt him enough, I'd hurt myself enough. I couldn't let this happen. Not over a stupid love letter.

Shiota drew two short swords, accepting my challenge. I had to avoid the seal, but I needed to be close to those drums. Shikamaru was still on his knees, trying to suck in breath although it was useless. His eyes were confused, never leaving me.

"Great sickling winds!" I roared, swiping my tessen. The trees behind Shiota exploded and she tried to shield her face. Her movements were too fast to see as she leapt off the falling logs, rising above the dust. I didn't waste time, darting forward to meet her.

My closed tessen was blocked by her swords. I brought my knee upward, slamming it into her chest. Not very ladylike, but she coughed and I knew I had winded her. Just enough time, I thumped her drum three times. Three lifesaving heartbeats.

Her sword swung upwards and my blood spurted. I clutched the arm close to me, bouncing backwards to a safe distance. I raised my fan in defense and she shot toward me. The swords clashed against the fan, clanging echoing in the new clearing. I tried to force her back, but she was too strong and I fell back.

My legs kicked out, only to miss her knees, she was already above me. I reached into my pocket, three shuriken flew toward Shiota. She was forced to dodge, interrupting her attack. Smart, she knew those shuriken weren't like normal, they would have shattered her swords.

I was able to roll over, swinging my tessen again. "Whirlwind dance!"

The wind knocked her back before she could jump. She slammed into a tree, and I saw her gasp again. My arm was still bleeding, weakened, but I had to take the chance. I sailed into a long kick, landing squarely on her chest. She was stunned. My hands beat the drums slowly, watching for the moment she would retaliate.

I heard Shikamaru groan as blood rushed back through his system again. This would kill him eventually, I didn't want to have to revive him again.

I was so distracted that I missed the dangerous glint in Shiota's eyes. Her sword flashed forward again. My ribs were on fire suddenly, two long gashes just beneath my breasts. It was superficial, but the pain made me cry out. I only had to hold out for five more minutes.

"Enough, Hime-sama," Shiota's voice was tight. "Gaara wants him gone. And you are proving an annoyance."

She pushed me back, I grunted as I hit the ground. Blood was seeping from my wounds, soaking my purple kimono. Shiota bit her thumb and planted her hand into the ground.

Brilliant golden feathers flashed out from under her. Dammit, a summon. Her sandy eagle glared down at me. I couldn't defeat this thing in under three minutes. I doubted I could defeat it at all. Wind attacks against a bird were not exactly devestating.

I looked over at Shikamaru.

His hand was against his chest, his face wracked with pain. I owed him this.

I roared my fury at Shiota, brandishing my fan. I had to try, he'd do the same for me.

"Sickling winds!" I poured my chakra into the blow, pushing the strength up. I spun on my heel, letting the wind flow wide. The air filled with a blast of sliced feathers. The great eagle shrieked in anger, bearing down on me. Bad move.

I leapt backward, bounding off the trees, trying to get some height to work with. The giant's claws clutched the air just inches away from me as I moved. My heart started thumping, I was running out of time. I swiped at the bird, blowing it back a few feet and jumping higher.

I jumped, swooping down on the eagle, aiming for Shiota. Two brilliant wings flapped, the bird turned and grasped me in its talons. The air was pushed out of my lungs, the claws jabbing into my sides.

My tessen dropped from my hands, clattering to the ground. I watched it fall, and despair filled me. Shikamaru had collapsed, unconscious. He was going to die, and it was going to be my fault.

No, I wasn't ready to lose him.

With all my strength, I bit down on the mighty leg holding me.

The eagle let out a surprised squawk, the talons loosening. It was enough. I grabbed a handful of feathers and hauled myself free. Another handful, and another, I climbed painfully to the bird's back. It was shrieking, trying to shake me loose.

My sore arm screamed in pain but I didn't care. Shikamaru was dying. And for once with that boy, I was going to do exactly what I needed to. Shiota stood to face me as I crawled onto the eagle's back. My eyes narrowed and a look of fear crossed her face. She was right to be scared.

With a roar of determination I launched myself at her. She was so fast, but I didn't care if she could race lightning. Her blocks were becoming slow under the force of my punches, and finally I knocked her onto her back. My fists came down in a rain of blows, her lip was bleeding, her eyes blackened.

The eagle took a sudden upwards turn, and I remembered Konohamaru's fight. I flashed her an ugly smile and ripped one sword from her grip. I tried to mimic the young boy's motion, plunging the sword into the bird's spine with one hand, at the same time grabbing a hold of the drums at Shiota's hip.

The eagle screamed as the sword ripped its spine apart, using its own strength and my weight to drag the blade. As I'd hope, the leather bindings on the drums snapped, leaving me in a freefall, but clinging to my prize.

I landed safely, and looked up. The other woman was still in the air. I took the time, beating the drums fiercely, trying to mimic a normal human heart. The blissfully uninterrupted rhythm felt like it was returning my bloodflow, as well. I was in time, I had to be.

The weight on top of me pried my hands away from the drum, and an unbearable pain shot through my right arm. I looked down to see her shortsword straight through my forearm. She drew it out, making me scream in agony. Shiota slammed me down on my back, her sword at my throat.

"I will not, Hime-sama," she snarled in my face, truly angry now, "let you hurt Gaara. In any way."

Suddenly a hand grasped her hair, dashing her head against the tree next to us. Shiota slumped on me, out cold. Her weight was lifted from me and tossed aside.

"Your seal wore off," a panting Shikamaru informed the motionless body. He sunk to his knees next to me, looking like he was about to pass out.

I leaned up, just looking at his face. I'd done it. My skin stung all over, I was covered in blood, I'd be in bandages for weeks, and would be using my right arm for a long time. But I'd done it, he was alive.

The way he was looking at me made my legs weak. I laughed weakly. "You troublesome man."

He gave me an exhausted smile for my dumb joke.

Without speaking he took his forehead protector from his arm and wrapped it around my broken arm. He gave me an apologetic look and tightened it. I yelled out at the pain, but the band would make an effective tourniquet and stop the blood. My body slumped against his.

For a brief moment he wrapped his arms around me, squeezing me gently, as if thanking me for defending him. A tear started welling in my eye and I blinked it away. This felt too good.

Then his arms were supporting me, helping me to stand. I needed to get back to base, explain this to Gaara, try to explain this. There was no real excuse for trying to kill an ANBU under his orders. Then, there was no excuse for trying to have my friend killed.

I looked up at him. Yes, he was my friend. I'd denied it for a long time, I didn't want friends, or need them, I had my brothers. But this lazy ass had worked his way in. His company was irreplaceable.

"You're going to be in trouble for this," he said softly.

"So are you," I smirked up at him through my pain. We would both have a lot of explaining to do if anyone knew I had been here. "If anyone asks, I wasn't here, okay? Don't tell your hokage I helped you."

He nodded solemnly. I staggered over to Shiota's body, hauling her over my good shoulder. I looked over my shoulder and smiled at him.

He looked like he was about to say something, but stopped, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Get going," I ordered. "Your village will want to know of your escape."

--

I stumbled into the hokage's office. The sun was just breaking over the horizon. I didn't know how my body had supported me the whole way here, but I was determined to know that Konohamaru was back safely.

I burst through her door, not bothering to knock. I knew that she'd already be awake. And she was, the scrolls Konohamaru had carried were rolled out on her desk. I breathed a sigh of relief.

She greeted me with a sneaky smile.

"Shikamaru, Konohamaru has already been in to relate your recent activities."

"Yes," I gasped. "Suna... Suna..."

She cut me off. "Yes, these scrolls are quite interesting. I've a few questions before you go to the hospital."

"Okay," I sighed. She didn't seem very upset about the impending invasion.

"Konohamaru says that you neglected to search all of the Kazekage's desk for information. Did you not feel the protection of Konohagakure to be sufficient reason to brave a trap?"

The third degree, great, just what I needed. "The trap was complex, I would rather get this information to you safely, than risk being killed or recaptured for information of uncertain worth."

"A wise decision," she said, eyeing me critically. "Why did you rescue Konohamaru?"

"He was a hostage, I didn't want Suna to have any advantages on us. Also it's protocol to rescue any other prisoners." I hung my head, exhausted. I wasn't in the mood. I'd had two women playing havoc with my heart in the last twelve hours, I didn't need a third playing with my head.

"Well," she looked over the scrolls on the desk. "You've escaped from a medium-security facility, managed to bring significant intelligence regarding an impending attack on our village, and from what I understand, outrun an S-rank ninja. This is exactly what I'd expect from a jounin."

"Does that mean I don't have to take the exam?" I joked.

Tsunade looked up at me, smiling wickedly. "You just did."

My jaw dropped. "What? Then Suna..."

"Gaara graciously offered to be the aggressor in this scenario." She beamed at me. "Congratulations, you passed!"


	7. Short Goodbyes

I glowered down at my younger brother. He wouldn't be intimidated but it made me feel better. My arm was in a sling, it had taken the medical ninja hours to resolve the damage done, and I still needed a lot of recovery time. The wounds on my chest would scar, as would the one on my forearm.

"I only intended for her to scare him," Gaara said evenly. "He's not appropriate company for you to be keeping."

I snorted, his meaning was as clear as day. "If you're referring to the incident in the hallway, we were arguing, not engaging in your imagined tawdry affair."

He stared me down. "You don't notice the way he looks at you. I doubt you notice the way you look at him."

I scoffed, and turned to walk away. Gaara looked away momentarily. I recognised guilt in him, although it was rare enough.

"I hoped Shiota would misinterpret my order," he admitted.

I turned back to him, shoulders pushed back in defiance.

"You know that you will not be ambassador forever." It was weird hearing him fill the silence.

"Yes." I nodded to him, turning away again.

"Nee-san." I turned back once more. He had never called me that before. His eyes stared up at me dolefully, his beautiful, vulnerable look. "I have something to discuss with you."

--

I stood outside the embassy, leaning against the wall. It was early, the sun was barely peeking over the horizon. Long shadows bathed the city and I waited for her. Like I had every other of her last days in Konoha.

She would rise early, dress in her long black travelling clothes, and try to slip out of town unnoticed. A new excuse every time. And every time she was surprised to see me standing here. I never did figure out this behaviour, but it was one of her thousand quirks that I took in my stride, waking up early automatically now, on these days.

The door slid open and she stepped out.

She was still bandaged, the scars of her battle announced all over her body. I finally understood what my father meant about my mother. Watching her fight desperately to keep my heart beating, I saw everything that had ever irritated me about her suddenly turned around in a shield for me.

She jumped slightly at the sight of me. I smirked. Every time. "You should expect me here by now."

"I never expect you out of bed before noon," she replied with a devilish smile.

"Wise woman."

We walked in silence to the gate. I thought about saying something, but the words wouldn't come easily, like they usually did. There wasn't much to say. I'd seen her fight for my life as though it was her own. What was there to say about that?

We reached the gate, and she turned to me.

"I spoke with Gaara," she said, not meeting my eyes. "He's asked me to enter ANBU training. I won't be the ambassador anymore."

I felt a chill run down my spine.

"You've wanted that for a long time."

"Yes," she met my eyes this time. "It's the best way to protect Gaara."

Gaara and Kankurou. Her reason for almost everything. I'd never had a brother or sister, but even I knew that her protection was unusually zealous. And now I knew what it was like to be the one she was fighting for. It hurt to know I'd have to let that go.

"You'll still accompany him to exams," I stated. It was more of a hope than a fact.

"Suna ANBU undergo years of training in isolation. But I imagine when I complete my training, I will do so." Now I wished she'd stop looking at me. This was all wrong. But this was what she wanted, this was what would make her happy.

I looked down at her, her big green eyes caught my gaze and trapped it. It wasn't that I'd planned it I just couldn't look away. My lips tingled. I'd known she was trouble from the start.

Her lips parted and a light blush coloured her cheeks. I felt like my feet were glued to the ground. I wanted to move forward, but my body wouldn't respond to me. It briefly flashed in front of my eyes, the beating I would get from her for trying to kiss her without her permission. But my heart was beating heavily in my chest, and I my lips were filled with static.

She stepped forward and my hesitation was gone. My hands threaded through her hair, the distance between us evaporated, our lips met. There was nothing gentle about it, we grabbed for each other, pulling closer. I frantically tasted her lips, her tongue, trying to make it last. She wrapped her good arm around my neck, I moved my hands to her waist. She was on her tiptoes, trying to reach me better.

Then I felt her smile against my mouth. My breathing hitched. I loved that smile. That smile that was all her, not a care in the world. The desperation fled from the kiss. All I wanted was that smile. I pulled her into a crushing hug, I didn't want to let her go. I touched her for one more, slow taste. It needed to be savoured.

We pulled away, suddenly embarrassed. I felt my cheeks grow hot and I couldn't look at her.

"I'll visit when I can, Shikamaru-kun," she said softly, face still pink.

"Goodbye, Temari-san," I mumbled.

She turned and walked away, hips swaying. I felt light-headed, my blood was still running hot, and watching her walk away was hard.

But then she turned her head to look back at me, and I saw her smile and touch her lips softly.

So much trouble, but sometimes, she made it all worthwhile.


	8. A New Enemy

**Author's Note:** Again. Thought I'd start of Part II with a short word. Thank you to all my reviewers. This is my first ever real romance story, and I've never really written action before either, so your encouragement has helped me enormously. Whenever I'm feeling blindingly awkward about my writing I just read over my reviews and keep going.

I've had a couple of short chapters, don't worry, things will pick up agains soon.

I hope you enjoy Part II as much as Part I.

**Part II**

--

I surveyed the scene, my gaze steady.

The request for defense had come by hawk in the early hours this morning. We had sent out a squad of ANBU, four jounins and one S-rank to help the beseiged village.

Now I was here, with two others. I was supposed to be issuing orders, but I didn't know what to say. I needed time to process what I was seeing. I knew that we would not be sent here if the ANBU were still suspected to be alive. But this wasn't the same as a few losses in battle.

The ruins of the village poured smoke into the sky, obscuring the view. But I knew that there was nothing left. No sobs or whimpers of survivors could be heard. No staunch figures for us to debrief. Nothing.

"You know the drill," I could finally speak. "Find the bodies, dispose of them."

--

I looked up at the sky. It was summer, so the clouds were sparse and the sun made it too bright. But I still liked to cloud watch.

My feet trod the streets of Konohagakure on their own, I knew the path too well to need to look. I turned to my right and stepped into the shop. Ino's flower shop was refridgerated to keep the stock fresh, it was a nice change from outdoors.

She wasn't at the counter, so I looked around. My eyes fell on a bunch of purple lilies. I thought back to when I was in the hospital, three years ago. Someone had given me one. I'd never thought to ask about it.

"Ready to go?" Ino had walked out, tossing her hairtie on the counter.

I nodded and draped an arm around her shoulder, leading her to the door. We weren't in love or anything. What we had was more a convenient arrangement. She had spent a lot of energy on her heartache over Sasuke, and she was tired. I was tired too, and the more my jounin missions filled out my muscles, the taller I had grown with maturity, it only seemed to attract unwanted attention. Our friends were all pairing off, and it had just seemed like a good decision.

She wasn't so bad anymore. With maturity she didn't talk so much, and between her missions, her home and helping out her parents she was too busy to stick her nose in anyone's buisness. Though she was still stick thin and perpetually on a diet. We spent most of our time together with me cloud watching and her catching up on paperwork.

Knowing that it wasn't serious, she didn't place too many demands on me. She was a nice, uncomplicated girl, an easy way to maintain some normalcy.

She filled me in on the village's gossip as we walked. I wasn't listening and she knew it.

"You're eighteen soon!" she gasped, catching my attention. "We should all go out for barbeque."

I couldn't imagine anything I wanted less than a party, but I got the feeling that her need to socialise had nothing to do with my birthday.

"I have a better idea," I said dryly. "How about we don't."

"Killjoy," she grumped.

"You know about flowers," I changed the subject. "The purple lilies in the shop. What do they mean?"

She loved nothing more than to talk about flowers, so at least I'd well and truly distracted her from the idea of celebrating my birthday.

"Oh, you noticed them?" She looked delighted, then assumed that superior look in preparation for lecturing me on her area of expertise. "We don't stock them very much, because they only grow in the oasises of the Land of Wind and usually spoil before they're transported this far. A white lily means purity or innocence, the red lily means high aspirations, but the purple lily means the first feelings of love."

She sighed dreamily, signifying her speech was over. My attention had wandered a bit, my eyes on the sky.

"Shikamarau-san!" I looked down in surprise, seeing Shizune running toward me, piggy in her arms. She bowed to me as she caught up, slightly breathless. "Hokage-sama requires your presence immediately."

Damn, I thought I was done for the day. Tsunade was now my keeper, Shizune running to find me at all hours of day and night. I had joined the non-ANBU tactical division, and was sincerely regretting that decision. Sometimes I was called on for serious tactical problems, assassinations, infiltration, but more often... I had still not forgotten being dragged out of bed at 2am to be roared at by the wild-eyed hokage over an error in my paperwork.

Still, the consequences for not going would be far more severe than losing my free afternoon. I nodded my apology to Ino and joined Shizune.

Her pace was fast, and she apologised to me for not being able to tell me why the hokage had requested my presence in public. We had three A rank missions going on, and the chuunin exams were coming up, so it was more than likely something important.

As the door opened I supressed a groan. Hokage had bags under her eyes, her hair was a mess, her eyes piercing. She hated work as much as I did, and now it kept her from sleeping for days on end. I somewhat sympathised with her situation, but she had turned it around on me, if she had to work when she wanted to be gambling and drinking, I had to work when I wanted to be cloud watching.

"Get in here, Nara." She chugged down what I hoped was tea, her other hand holding three rumpled scrolls aloft, trying to read them all at once. "We have a situation."

I didn't talk. I'd learned very quickly that speaking when she was in this mood was a bad idea. Women.

"The Land of Wind has been attacked. Not Sunagakure, an outlying village. The civilian population were all killed, along with five ANBU. Hunternin have already made their report."

"Do we know who attacked?" I asked, stupidly.

"Who the hell do you think, Nara?" She roared at me. Never speak. Troublesome woman. "The raikage of course. There were a few dozen dead kumonin found at the scene."

I wondered if she had brought me here for a reason. A village of dead civillians was a tragedy, but if she wasn't going to let me speak I wasn't going to be offering much of a tactical point of view. Something was obviously off. Five ANBU should have been able to handle a raid on a village, if it was bad, tactically retreated. They shouldn't have been killed.

"What are your orders, hokage-sama?" I asked, trying to sound respectful. That was usually a safe question.

"I've already corresponded with the Kazekage. We'll be holding the chuunin exams as usual, after which our allied forces will use Konoha as a base to launch a counterattack." She started shuffling her papers again. "Get your team onto devising strategies, and _you_, Nara, will make sure that the chuunin exams are completed without incident!"

I backed out of the office, and sighed heavily.

--


	9. An Expected Encounter

We had been travelling for five days. When I had trod this road a dozen times before it had been at an enhanced speed. But this time I wasn't travelling alone.

A dozen hunternin, four dozen ANBU, our strategic team and our best assassins all followed behind the Kazekage. This kind of mobilisation didn't lean itself toward speed. At least we wouldn't be attacked by bandits, I smirked.

At least Konoha was in sight now. I needed a bath and a change of clothes. And to lose this itchy face paint. I hadn't visitted this village in three years, not since Shikamaru's jounin exam. Not a single brick had changed. The guards didn't bother to say anything as we approached the gates. This place still felt awkward for me, but I didn't let it show, keeping pace with the rest of my unit.

"Hey, ugly," I called to Kankurou. He turned to me with a grimace. I nodded toward Gaara and he followed me to walk beside our little brother. It went without saying that, when we were available, Kankurou and I were Gaara's personal body guards. He didn't look up at our movement.

The rest of the force would be camping out at the academy, the hokage had arranged to temporarily move classes to accommodate us. But Kankurou and I would still stay with him at the embassy. Blood relations afforded us that privilege.

Our small army moving through the streets was drawing attention. News of the attack on our land would be common knowledge by now. This was the first time in history that one village had used another as a base for their forces. I knew that the Godaime had carved herself a place in Gaara's heart for this. He had been shattered by the slaughter in his Land. It was true that the actual village belonged to a feudal lord, but after repeated spats with the Raikage, we all knew that this was to get at Gaara.

Their was a welcoming party already formed in front of the Hokage's office. The Fifth, her odd little advisor, the two elders, and a few ANBU. My heart skipped a beat. Shikamaru stood at the next building. He had grown. He was taller than I remembered, and no sign of that lanky teenager I had known, he'd finally grown into his height. That tiny weakling I had fought so long ago had grown into a real man. The sight of him made my stomach flip. And he was hand in hand with Yamanaka Ino.

They exchanged a quick kiss and he dawdled to join the Hokage. Punctual as always.

His eyes skimmed the crowd, but didn't stop on me. We were just a hundred painted faces to an onlooker, impossiblie to tell apart. Some people thought that our paint wasn't as effective at concealing our identities as the porcelain masks of other villages. I wondered if those critics had ever tried to wear a mask in a desert. Breathing was an essential part of life as an ANBU.

We exchanged bows and pleasantries with the Hokage's party, but my mind was elsewhere. In one week the exams would be over, and our assault on Kumogakure would start. It wouldn't be easy, if the attack on the small village had been any indication. They had probably been building their forces for a while now. The attack on Gaara years ago had been testing our strength, their surrender afterwards a ploy.

This greeting was taking too long. I needed my bath, we needed to regroup, talk strategy. We didn't have the time for this.

Too late I realised Gaara had been talking to me.

"Please repeat, Kazekage-sama," I requested, eyes straight ahead. If it was anyone but me there would have been hell to pay.

"You will be liaising with the strategy team this week, Tessenitachi," he repeated blandly. "I'll have another bodyguard assigned."

"Yes, Kazekage-sama." I bowed to him.

--

Finally the day was over. I flopped onto my bed. It seemed like we would never end the revision of our battle plans. My division was filled with idiots and geeks, it drove me insane. None of them ever stopped thinking, and by association, talking. And talking, led to planning, replanning, reworking. None of them ever just stopped to think properly and get it right.

I'd be liaising with one of the ANBU until the chuunin exams were over, a hunter-nin. Most of our ANBU were too busy with the exams. Our strategy unit wouldn't be in charge of the frontal assault, but we'd be supplying the plans to base the ANBU's plans off. At least all the mistakes would be corrected by competent nin.

At least Tessenitachi was easy on the eyes. Tall and curvy. I smirked. Something to look at when the arguments became too boring. Probably all kinds of trouble. I'd learned my lesson about Suna's kunoichi.

I'd tried to find Temari in the crowd, but it was impossible. There were at least twenty blondes in the crowd, and a lot of them were fan-wielders. Their faces were so obscured that I couldn't make out any distinctive features.

I suddenly felt a draught.

My windows had blown open, out onto the balcony. With a sigh I stood up. I walked to the windows, intending to close them, but stopped. She was leaning against the railing, looking out over the estate. My liaison.

"What do you want?" I asked. "Talks don't start until tomorrow."

_Oh, please,_ I begged mentally, _don't let her be one of those women who needs to know everyone around them personally._

"I'm offended," she said dryly, not turning to look at me. She was watching the deer nestle down for the evening. "Don't you recognise me, Shikamaru-kun?"

Her green eyes suddenly caught mine and I stepped back. "Tem-"

"Tessenitachi," she cut me off, then guestured to her painted face. "While I wear this."

I frowned. How had I not recognised her today?

"Get in here," I turned back into my bedroom without waiting for her reply. I heard her footsteps follow me in, and the clatter of her discarded tessen.

I sat on my bed and faced her. The facepaint was distracting me, I wished she'd take it off.

"Good to see you, too," she mocked, not sitting down. "I'm here because every single staff member at the embassy is trying to use the bathroom at once. Can I take a bath here?"

My eyebrows raised. The first time she'd spoken to me in three years, was to break in and use my bathroom. I could never tell what was coming next with this woman.

I could think of nothing that would make me more uncomfortable than Temari stripping off in my home, but upon closer inspection she was tired and dirty. They had been travelling for days. I sighed heavily.

"Down the hall on the left."

She didn't wait for a gilded invitation.

I lay back on my bed again as the door shut behind her. _Do not feed the animals, they may bite, _I thought to myself. And bite Temari would, I was sure. I had strayed too close last time, and had the scars to prove it. No more.

I wasn't that upset when she left. I really did want her to achieve her dream. It was just that she left an ache in my chest with that kiss, and it was alright at first but it grew worse with time. I wasn't really sure what it was. Ino would tell me time and time again that I was a genius, but so stupid when it came to people. It would take someone smarter than me to identify that ache.

All I knew was that I didn't want it to come back.

I thought over our battle plans once more, distracting myself. They were fairly solid, but if I'd had my way they'd be better. The ANBU could handle it. Not my problem anymore.

I blanked my mind until I heard the door slide open again. I scoffed. She had stolen my robe.

"Comfy?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Very," she replied, toweling her hair dry. I laughed softly, seeing her face still covered with black smudges. She sat down next to me, eyes narrowed at me. "What?"

I took the towel from her hands and started wiping away the remaining paint. She frowned as if this was a constant problem. I kept my expression even as I cleaned her, but as the last trace came away, my hands stopped moving. Just like I remembered her, but somehow different. She was all grown up, and just like back then, she was only more beautiful with every year.

I shoved the towel into her hands. "Done."

"Thanks," she said flippantly. "This stuff is worse than sand."

Why did she grow her hair? She looked better with short hair. Maybe.

"Hunter-nin now, huh?" I asked. This was more than what she'd hoped for, she must have aced her training.

"What were you expecting?" she asked with a superior smirk. It had been too long since I had last seen her. I needed to take her out, I wanted to hear every word over a game of shogi and her favourite sweet tea. I knew she'd have me laughing from the word go.

I saw the scar on her right arm and wanted to touch it. It had never healed.

Gaara had tried to kill me for having an argument with her. That scar was proof of who really paid the price. The image had never left me, her pinned to the ground, bleeding and screaming, knife against her throat. She needed to leave.

"Isn't Gaara expecting you back?" I asked, standing up and turning my back to her. She'd come here for what she'd needed, I'd given it to her. We could catch up when we weren't alone in my bedroom.

She looked hurt. "Sure, I'll get dressed and show myself out."

I tried not to look as she walked out, tried not to hear the click of the front door a minute later. I failed.

--

Five jounin slouched over the strategy table, yelling. A half dozen papers were scattered across the table, crude drawings indicating troop movement. The arguing had started at daybreak. There was no end in sight.

I sat against the wall, away from the table. Temari was leaning next to me, observing the scene in front of her. She had started her observations with a smirk, obviously thinking Konoha was disorganised and undisciplined compared to Suna. Her expression had faded into a kind of bewildered amazement after the second hour.

"Do they not breathe?" she asked me.

I looked down from the ceiling to meet her gaze. "Not that I can tell."

I was used to this by now. At first I'd tried to join in the initial debate, but I soon learned that after about four hours they were too tired to argue anymore and I could easily get my suggestions heard. Pity that the first step of that plan was so very, very loud.

The guys weren't so bad, at least they were smart. When they weren't in the strategy room they were actually kind of fun to hang out with.

I had never seen Temari exercise so much patience. That ANBU training must have done her good, if this had happened three years ago the strategy table would be splinters by now. This experience had me raising my own voice a few times.

"Play Shogi with me tonight," Temari said without looking at me, growing bored of watching the prize fight in front of us.

"I'm not falling for that one twice," I smirked.

She almost laughed. "I'm serious."

"I have plans." This time I couldn't meet her eye, because I wasn't lying. I was taking Ino out.

"Ah, of course. With Yamanaka-chan, I assume."

She already knew. Of course, I had been with Ino when I went to greet the Sunanin. Well at least that was out in the open. "Yes."

"Good to see that you finally have a social life."

I was tiring of this conversation. I hadn't thought of Ino since Temari had perched on my balcony, which was stupid. Ino was my girlfriend. I stood up.

"Stop talking," I said loudly. The reast of my team fell quiet, exhausted. "This is how it's going to go."

I grabbed one of the maps of Kumogakure and started scribbling. "We'll take the three main enterances, seperating out our forces evenly. We'll first supress the defenses at the walls, then bunch the fight into these three roads. Make it look like we're heading for the Raikage."

I indicated on the map my plans, and the rest of the room watched intently. "It will break out into this area, we'll have them flanked and cornered. Our objective will be to push the enemy back so that Tessenitachi can lead the hunter-nin around this path." I showed them on the map. "Their objective wil be to assassinate the Raikage. That's one dozen ANBU, six for his guards, six for the Raikage himself. Konoha's hunter-nin can join them at the Godaime's discretion."

The others looked over the map, trying to find a flaw with the plan. I'd had four uninterrupted hours to think of this plan. They weren't going to find a fault with it. If they did, I might snap and kill them.

The silence in the room was blissful.

This meeting was over.


	10. A Tall Tale

The night had fallen over Kumogakure. I looked over the darkened village, perched in the trees. The ANBU had approved my plan, with a few minor tweaks from the intelligence they had received. Now my team and two ANBU specialists were preparing to oversee the battle.

I felt the odd churning of my stomach that was familiar now. If this failed it would be my fault. I always hoped that my plan would be rejected, that ANBU would take over and rework everything, call me an idiot and take it into their own hands. They hadn't done it yet. So here I was again, people's lives resting on my plan.

Hyuuga Neji and Hyuuga Hinata were resting on a branch a few feet ahead of us, eyes open, scanning. Two hundred nin were hidden in the trees around us, two hundred nin who seemed to be resting on my shoulders, it was a wonder I didn't fall through the branch.

"Four guards patrolling the east gate," Neji stated, relaxing back. "13 on defense of the wall."

"The front gate has two guards," Hinata responded. "The west also has four, and 17 guards across the section."

This was as far as we could control. From here the ANBU would give the order to advance, then it was up to the attackers. I could only sit back and hope that the plan would work.

The ANBU next to me gave the order, our forces were on the move. The initial infiltration would be silent, the guards around the walls dead before they knew what hit them. Once the walls were secured, things would start getting noisy. We needed the village to know we were there, force an open confrontation. Every ninja in the village had to come out and fight, allowing us open access to the Raikage. The hunter-nin would slip past and finish it quickly. We didn't need any more casualties than necessary, once the Raikage was dead, we would end the battle.

I saw the blackened figures swooping down onto the walls. Stage One was underway. This would go quickly. Fire nin were the first wave, sweeping in silently.

Within minutes four puffs of flame lit up the walls, just big enough to spot if you were looking for them.

"Stage Two, go," the radio sounded.

Now it was time to announce our presence. Our nin flooded from the trees, the ground, the sky. Two hundred of the best ninja from Konoha and Suna pouring to the walls, concentrated around the gates.

The sound ninja headed up this stage, shrieking, twanging, godawful frequencies echoed through the landscape, like some sick orchestra. Fireballs started blowing into the village from the edges.

This was probably the strangest strategy I had ever developed. If we wanted to occupy a village usually, stealth would have been the element. But that's not what we were aiming for. We didn't even want there to be fatalities on either side, but that wasn't possible. No, this was just a distraction to give our hunter-nin the opening.

Lights were flickering on all over the village, our presence was well and truly known. Soon the defending force would be out in numbers.

Any nin who could fly, through summoning or otherwise, was swooping through the streets now, buzzing the houses. Every single nin in the village needed to come out to play. We didn't want the Raikage to have a single additional guard. If we gave anyone an opening they would rush to his side. They all needed to be fighting for their lives and their families, no chance to be backup for anyone else.

Now the streets were teeming with summons, animals of every shape tearing up the pavement, engaging the first kumonin. This was going to plan so far.

"Stage Three, go."

Our nin started along their given paths, more and more kumonin engaging them. The rooftops were blazing with the first signs of serious battle. This was good, the fight was bunching exactly as we had hoped.

The fighting bunched back slowly, the kumonin now awake and joining the fray. We needed to wait until they were pushed back almost all the way to the central square of the town, near the Raikage's building. If things went to plan, we'd take out the Raikage only metres away from the fighting.

I had always been patient, but my whole body was tense as I waited for the lines to move. We were taking heavy losses, but so were they. My friends were down there, I could only hope they were okay.

"Stage four, go."

Finally. The hunter-nin shot out from beneath us, just a dozen sandy blurs. Their path was set and clear. Through the east gate, circling around the village to the back of the Raikage's home. He wouldn't have moved, his personal guards would be with him, keeping him from the fighting. Our fighting had to be restrained, if Kumogakure's losses were to severe, or too much structural damage done, he would join the battle and our chance would be lost.

Forcing a strong enemy into the defensive position was risky, it always was. This time it was our best chance.

--

The battle had raged for at least an hour. The hunter-nin were maintaining radio silence, so we had no way of knowing if they had reached the Raikage. The streets were littered with bodies, from both sides. At a glance I would have said we had lost 15 of our force. That was high, but within our estimations.

Suddenly the radio crackled to life. "_Oh fuck, pull us out, pull out!"_

The transmission dissolved insto static and alarmed glances passed through our team. The ANBU leader took charge.

"Hunter-nin, report. What is your status?"

I fell back, nearly blown from my perch as a huge gust of wind swept over us. We all stuggled to regain our balance, trying to see what was going on.

It wasn't hard to see. An enormous crow blocked out the moonlight, hovering over the village. A boss summon. Oh, no, that meant...

My thoughts were cut off by a puff of smoke, heralding the enterance of Boss Gama. No, no, this was bad. We didn't want collateral damage, this couldn't turn into a struggle between titans. And the main forces were supposed to be staying out of the Raikage's battle. Fuck Naruto.

The escalation was inevitable. Soon the crow and the frog were joined by a wolf, a lizard, an eagle. Buildings were being flattened, whole blocks wiped out by the swipe of massive limbs. This was getting bad, fast.

"_Get us out, mission failed!_" The hunter-nin's transmission was almost a scream. "_Abort!_"

"All available nin," my ANBU counterpart announced. "Mission is to retrieve any hunter-nin still alive. Priority one. Everyone else, call back your summons, retreat. I repeat, we are aborting, retreat."

He turned to us, now addressing the group. "That goes for us, too, let's get going. Time to fall back to the evacuation point."

The hunter-nin were caught.

As I raced through the trees, my chest started to hurt, my breathing hitched. _Any hunter-nin still alive..._ How many were dead? Was Temari among them?

Had I killed her?

The trees flew at me but my body was numb. If they were dead, it was my fault. Chouji, Naruto, Neji, Sakura, Hinata, Lee, Tenten, Temari.

My fault.

--

The evacuation point was packed. We hadn't been followed far by the kumonin, and now everyone was disorganised, looking for their squad leaders, their friends.

We weren't even close to getting a report on what happened. Everything had turned so fast. The first call for help had come before the summons started. I wanted to know, like the rest of my team, what had gone wrong. But first I needed to find my friends.

The medical nin were already organising stretchers, trying to heal up the most critical injuries.

"Hey, Shikamaru!"

I whirled around at Naruto's voice. His big grin wasn't dulled one bit by the grim scene surrounding him. I was sure that my grin lit up the landscape as well when I saw what he was holding, or rather, who. Her braids were singed off at the shoulder, her face smudged, and apparently she was too weak to walk on her own.

"I didn't reconise her at first," Naruto said thoughtfully, then smiled again. "But then she said 'Hey, idiot,' and I knew it had to be her."

I took a restrained step forward, pulling her out of Naruto's arms and into my own. I stopped myself from hugging her.

"The others?"

Naruto smiled and rubbed the back of his neck. "They're fine, only a few scrapes. I'd stay away from Sakura, she's scary when she's busy."

Just like her master. I smiled and thanked Naruto, then looked down at the limp body in my arms. I had expected her to look angry at being carried around, maybe even a bit grateful for being rescued. She was neither. Her expression was blank, faraway.

When she spoke, I could barely hear her. "No one told us his fucking kids would be there."

"What?" I sat down, letting her lie on the ground while I supported her back. She snatched the pack of cigarettes out of my pocket and lit one with trembling hands. Naruto had wandered off to bother someone, so we were alone, or at least no one was paying attention to us. "They should have been evacuated with the rest of the civillians."

"Well they weren't." She took a long, shuddering drag of the cigarette. I had never seen her like this. What the hell had she seen? "They got Kankurou, captured him with his own fucking puppet."

"What happened in there?"

She was silent for a while. She looked so weak, like one of her brother's puppets when its strings were released. Probably a run in with a medical ninja, I needed to take her to Sakura, get her healed. But I had to know what had happened.

She took a deep breath, like I was debriefing her. I guess I was. "The Raikage was in his courtyard as predicted. Team 2 entered through the upper floor, as directed, to engage the ANBU. Team 1 hung back, preparing to engage the target. We... we entered the room, but the children hadn't been evacuated. They were there, cowering in the corner."

Her voice cracked.

"The oldest is a genin, he thought we were after his mother and sisters. He tried to engage us. We tried to restrain him and push past, but he knew how to replicate. We were trying to restrain him when the ANBU heard us. They came in and thought... they thought one of us had transformed into the boy. So they slit his throat. Right there, in front of his sisters."

She stopped talking, looking away. My heart squeezed. She's seen a kid murdered in front of her. Emotional training meant nothing at that point.

Temari's voice was barely recognisable as she continued. "The Raikage heard the screaming, he followed his ANBU. Team 1 tried to engage, but he was too fast. They managed to get some of his guards away but our team was trapped in the hallway, against the Raikage and four ANBU. We kept trying to get the fight away from the kids, out to the courtyard again so that Team 1 could help us..."

She clammed up and I couldn't stop myself from grabbing her hand. She still hadn't met my eyes. So that's why we failed. The plan had completely fallen apart.

"Come on," I picked her up again. She didn't need to talk about this anymore. "Let's get to the medical tents."


	11. A Numb Aftermath

**Author's Note:** Again. After careful thought, I've decided that the story planned in my head is definitely rated M. I can write it more placidly if that's requested of me, but speak now or forever hold your peace. Next chapter will be posted in 48 hours.

--

"_Once this is over, I'm giving you a new assignment. You'll be able to visit this village, but I want you on the field more often."_

_I gulped, looking down at the Hokage. My heart skipped a beat._

"_Nara, you won't see her again." Her voice was nonchalant, but her expression serious. "This has gone far enough."_

_--_

"Team 1 attempted to engage the Raikage, however he escaped them to engage Team 2." I stood in front of the Hokage, who looked grim. Gaara stood behind her, listening to my report. "Team 1 managed to engage and eliminate three ANBU, however both teams were forced to engage the Raikage and four ANBU in the limits of the property. Heavy losses were suffered. Four hunter-nin were rescued, all heavily injured, two in critical condition. At least one of the missing ANBU is suspected alive, Sabaku no Kankurou was seen captured."

I felt Gaara's eyes bore into me. We had nowhere to go from here. Our forces had been decimated, we couldn't attempt a second attack. Hokage would murder Naruto for his stunt with Boss Gama.

"The order to retreat was given when the hunter-nin reported mission failure, and massive collateral damage was occurring."

"Thank you, Nara, that will be all."

I turned and left the office. They had taken heavy losses as well, maybe a ceasefire could be negotiated. Maybe a surrender on the condition of Kankurou's return. Even that was unlikely, considering the loss of the Raikage's son. There was no hope of victory here.

Kankurou would be the price of battle. The eye for an eye. The Kazekage's brother for the Raikage's son.

I wandered in the general direction of my bench. I needed some headspace. Forty-three nin from Konoha and Suna had died. My fault. Temari had her leg tendons severed by a medical nin, Tsunade had been able to repair the damage, but she was still sore. It was a miracle that my friends hadn't been hurt. If things had gone just a little differently, I would have been alone.

But they didn't. A hundred other times they hadn't. I couldn't let this stop me. My father had drilled that into me years ago. Only a coward would back down now.

So had Temari. _Are you afraid of getting hurt?_

No one liked getting hurt. Everyone was afraid when they stopped to think about it. She was afraid for her brothers, what was so different? I wanted to bring my team home safely, she wanted to bring her family home. She was a hyopcrite. I bet she cried her eyes out when she heard that Gaara was home safe.

Damn woman. We hadn't been close in years, she had just gone away. Now she was trying to make trouble in my battle plans, getting herself traumatised, losing her brother. I shouldn't have touched her, ANBU should have debriefed her, I would have received the report. Shouldn't have seen her eyes look so dead.

This was exactly what I had sworn off. Every stupid little thing that troublesome woman did lingered in my head. It was too troublesome to deal with the big things. I couldn't afford to lose focus now, too much was at stake.

My bench looked welcoming, all the more for the skinny blonde perched delicately upon it. She was buried in paperwork as usual. She looked up and smiled at me. This was exactly what I needed. My nice, untroublesome girlfriend to smile and listen and not lecture me on emotional training.

"Hey, Ino."

I sat next to her, letting one arm wrap around her waist. She set down her paperwork.

"I heard what happened. It must have been terrible to watch."

Yes, it was terrible, I didn't need to be reminded. "I didn't see that much."

"But at least all our friends were okay," she flipped her hair, smiling. "You must feel awful though, I know it was your plan."

Yeah, it was my plan, I did feel awful.

"Kankurou-san was captured. We think he's still alive."

She looked at me puzzled, like she couldn't understand why I'd bring that up. "You don't even like him. But I know how scary Kazekage-sama is."

Yeah, he was scary. I stood up. This wasn't working. Usually I'd come here, and whine to her about all my problems, she'd say 'that's awful' 'that's terrible' and I wouldn't feel so bad about sulking. But today it was just not working. The more I sulked, the worse I felt. I didn't need this today.

"Hey, Shikamaru?" She had that tone in her voice when she was trying to wheedle something out of me. I turned back to her, hands behind my head. "Why did you ask me about the purple lily the other day?"

I sighed. Women. They always had to turn an innocent question into something with subtext. "No reason."

"It was because Temari gave you one, right? When you were in the hospital."

Why did she even remember that? I hated when women asked questions they already knew the answer to. I didn't know why I was getting so irritated by this conversation. "Yeah, I guess."

A blush spread across Ino's cheeks. "She's back in the village, isn't she?"

What was this, jealousy? "Yeah."

No, not jealousy. She was smiling. I watched in amazement as she gathered up her paperwork and walked toward me.

"Shikamaru-kun," she kissed me on the cheek. "Thank you for keeping me company all this time. I would have been very lonely without you."

I watched as she walked away, feeling a rush of affection for her. No, I wasn't in love with her. But she knew I needed space, and had given it to me without asking. Just like the little sister I still prayed I would never have. Only less annoying.

--

This village and its stupid ANBU. Everything that ever came out of this place was a disaster. The genin at my first chuunin exam had been mortified to see ninja who were actually good at things. Anything. That should have been my first clue to keep my distance. The only time anyone did anything worthwhile around here was when it was either succeed or die.

Now they didn't have their own lives at stake, it was my brother's. I trusted Gaara, but his hands were bound. He was Kazekage first, brother second, and I didn't begrudge him that. It probably frustrated him more than me.

My mind was whirling with anger. It was all that stupid Nara's fault. Genius my ass. This was his plan, I had watched him come up with it. Now not only did we not have victory, but they had my baby brother. He was probably distracted thinking of his bimbo. Yamanaka-chan, who wasn't even bright enough to earn a place in our forces, much less lead a hunter-nin squad.

Some days I felt jealous of her, wished I could be skinny, wished my hair was blonder, my voice higher. Then I remembered that I'd rather be a good ninja.

I tied my hair back in four ponytails, yanking them into place impatiently. After my new haircut, compliments of the gogyou no jutsu salon, I decided to return to my old style. No face paint today, either. I wouldn't be working as an ANBU. My old tessen was back in Suna, I hadn't thought I would need it. The uniform black fan I had been issued with would have to do.

I turned around and started shoving rations into my pack. I'd have to travel light. I wore my white dress, it was easiest to move in, and I would need to be unhindered in the days to come. My bedroll was strapped to the top of my pack and I hefted it onto my shoulder.

I turned to leave, but stopped. Nara Shikamaru leaned against my doorframe. My mouth felt dry and I cursed myself.

"Going somewhere?" he asked nonchalantly.

"None of your business," I tried to shove past him into the hall, but he held up a hand. I stopped before he touched me. He had no damn business here. None. He was the cause of all this trouble.

"I wasn't going to try to stop you," he said with a frown. "You're going to try to rescue your brother."

"There's no 'try' about it," I met his gaze evenly. "I'm going to end this."

His eyebrows raised and I walked back into the room, sitting on my bed with a sigh. "You're going to assassinate the Raikage?"

I didn't answer. The last thing I needed was to be interrogated. I knew that I couldn't just walk in and cut his throat, it wouldn't be that simple. But there would be a way. I'd have to follow him, observe him, find the right time. Shikamaru wasn't the only one who could be smart.

"That's a suicide mission," Shikamaru stated bluntly.

"I know," I admitted. But that was the price of failure. Gaara was already trying to set up negotiations for a surrender, but Kankurou would not be part of the deal. And I needed my brothers like the air I breathed. I could not let him die. I looked him in the eye. "But you can't stop me."

I would rescue Kankurou and Gaara, or die trying. What had all the Konohanin declared at the chuunin exams? _That's my way of the ninja._

If their way was to rush headfirst into battles they couldn't win, it could be my way, too.

He shrugged, but I saw his eyes flicker. "I told you, I'm not here to stop you."

"Then why are you here?"

"It's troublesome, but I guess I'll come with you." He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. My eyes widened.

Yes, we used to be close. But even back then, we weren't suicide mission close. This was my choice, I didn't need his death on my conscience. I tried again to push past him. "My family, my mission."

This time he grabbed me by the shoulder. "How are you planning to assassinate the Raikage when you don't even know where he'll be?"

"What do you mean?" I hissed at him.

He smirked, "We did have intelligence leading up to our attack. The Raikage is travelling to meet the Amekage in two days time, to discuss a treaty. He'll be travelling with four guards, it's the best chance for an assassination. We chose not to make that our target time because we don't know where he's meeting the Amekage, and we didn't want to risk taking on two kages at once."

"So I'll take him on there." I nodded, it was much better than what I had been planning.

"Not if I don't tell you what road he's taking."

Anger flared in my chest. What the hell was this? My brother was out there, trapped, a hostage. Or worse, dead. And he wanted to play games?

"What do you want?"

"I'm coming with you."

"You won't let me die if I refuse," I stated bluntly.

"And you won't let Kankurou die if I refuse."

Dammit. He always managed to get the upper hand on me. His smirk was infuriating me, I wanted to wipe it off his face with my tessen, show him what it meant to mess with ANBU. But then, he knew I wouldn't, not in the embassy. That was what made him so irritating.

He still had his hand on my shoulder. I shoved my palm into his shoulder, making him grunt in pain but release his hold.

"Go pack your stuff."

--


	12. A Graven Image

"_Nara, situations change. Tensions are running high between all the hidden villages. We have places where you're needed more."_

"_This is my home."_

"_Once this is over, I'm giving you a new assignment. You'll be able to visit this village, but I want you on the field more often." She stood up, turning to face the window. "You're going to be part of a new taskforce."_

_I gulped, looking down at the Hokage. My heart skipped a beat._

"_I can't leave this village, I have responsibilities here."_

"_Nara, you won't see her again." Her voice was nonchalant, but her expression serious. "I don't want you here waiting for her like a lovesick puppy every time she visits. This has gone far enough."_

_--_

Temari let her pack fall to the ground. We could see the coulds pouring down rain on the horizon. We were close to the land of rain. The Raikage would travel along a road not far from where we were sitting in about twelve hours. Enough time for us to rest up before the battle.

She looked exhausted, I noted as I set down my own pack. The damage to her legs had been mostly repaired, but wasn't fully healed yet. I shouldn't have let her come out here. I laughed at the thought. As if I could have stopped her.

The sun was setting over the horizon. I lay back on the grass, looking up at the clouds. "Are you ready for this?"

"Of course." She sat down beside me, looking out into the distance. "It's not too late to back out, you know."

Yeah, probably not. Part of me knew that it would save my life to just leave her right there. That was worth it, wasn't it? There wasn't much that was worth anything in death. But there were things that were definitely not worth it. Like having to look at myself in the mirror every day for the rest of my life after abandoning her.

"Same goes to you." She didn't reply. I hadn't expected her to. She wasn't backing down.

I watched the clouds turn pink. It was a pretty enough day. I didn't want to think about tomorrow, but it was kind of hard to ignore.

She lay down beside me and looked up at the sky. I stopped looking at the clouds. She was beautiful in the sunset. This was too unfair on her. I expected almost everything I did to end badly, that was the pitfall of not putting effort into anything. She didn't deserve this. She had been fighting tooth and nail to protect her brothers since I had met her.

I wished that she'd cry. Scream. Anything really. No one I knew would have been able to handle this. I'd know how to help her if it was Ino. I'd hug her, tell her it was okay, let the big boys handle the problem. That wasn't how Temari operated. If I hugged her she'd beat me up. If I told her it would be okay she'd call me on the lie. If I told her someone else would handle it I would be left lying here, alone.

This was the best I could do. It might have been what she wanted. Someone to help her without letting her admit that she needed it.

"What would you do if you only had twelve hours left to live?" I asked, joking.

"Probably lie on the grass with some jerk," she replied without hesitation.

"No regrets?" I turned to look at her again. "No skeletons in your closet?"

She smiled at me. That winning smirk that let me know just how stupid I was. "If I didn't have any skeletons, I wouldn't be here."

Cryptic answers. Perfect. Just the frustrating, troublesome woman I wanted to spend my last night alive with. She never made anything simple.

"Here to atone for your sins?"

"What would you talk about if you only had twelve hours left to live?" she mocked.

Damn her.

"I wouldn't."

She rolled to one side, looking at me with a sly smile. "Do anyway."

Pssh. Just like her, wanting me to talk when I just wanted to cloud watch. She rolled onto her back with her hands behind her head, one knee bent. Damn, she looked good in that dress. I shook my head. This was all wrong.

I was here to save Kankurou, not eyeball his sister. And those were mutually exclusive options.

"Fine then, I'd talk about..." I hadn't really thought of a way to finish that sentence. I'd kind of hoped something would come to me as I went along. I didn't talk about anything. I talked about strategy, history, missions and clouds. None of which seemed appealing as the choice for my last words.

"Tell me about the deer."

I started. The deer? She wanted to know about the deer? What was so interesting about that?

"Why do you want to know about the deer?"

"Stop arguing and just tell me." She sounded kind of... long suffering. I'd get beaten up if I didn't tell her.

I sighed and tried to think what she wanted to hear. I shot her a glance. She wasn't giving up on this topic, I could tell her that much from her expression.

"They..." I hesitated. This sounded stupid no matter how I worded it. "They belong to my clan. I grew up with them. We harvest their antlers as medicine for Hokage-sama."

I threw her another glance. She was still listening, not showing any signs of interrupting me. This was the most silent I'd ever seen her. "I don't know what you want me to say about them."

I expected her to get angry, to point out something that was so obvious to her but that I would never understand. But she didn't. She just looked at me through those dark green eyes. "Tell me what they mean to you."

I froze. I had never said anything to her about them. Not a single word. How did she...? This woman knew how to pinpoint someone's weakness in a heartbeat. As lethal in friendship as it was on the battlefield. "I don't want to talk about it."

I sat up. This was too uncomfortable. I started rifling through my pack, surprised that she wasn't pressing the issue.I fished out a bottle of sake and took a swig.

"Engaging the Raikage with a hangover?" she sniffed. "Smart."

I tossed her the bottle. "Shut up and relax."

--

We lay back on the grass, laughing. It was a kind of desperate, forced laugh, but at least it was laughter. It was okay. I didn't expect this to be like every night before. It was our last night and it was okay for that to be sad.

I felt a heavy, warm feeling in my chest from the sake. She had been hitting it a little harder than me. After her first few drinks her tongue had loosened. Now she didn't hold back, with her laughter, her stories, her swearing or her violence. But still not a single sign of weakness had slipped through the cracks.

The stars were out above us, a waning moon rose in the sky. It might have been hours since we first stopped to camp for the night, I couldn't tell.

Her laughter had faded, and I turned my eyes to her, only to be caught in her own gaze. She was looking at me without blinking or turning away. Staring. "Shikamaru, tell me about the deer."

This again? I sighed, looking up at the moon. It didn't sound so stupid with a little sake in me.

"They were always so different." I paused, but she didn't interrupt me. She really wanted to know. "They never... they were never troublesome. I just like to watch them. They're the only part of my family that isn't a pain."

She started giggling. I flushed in embarrassment for a moment, then realised that she wasn't laughing at what I'd said. Her giggling grew harder. Yeah, she'd had too much sake.

"You think your family is a pain?"

This time I laughed with her. It seemed so stupid now. My family, a pain. They were nothing compared to the Sabaku no Crazy People. Two mildly psychotic younger brothers, a father who would experiment on and then assassinate his own children and... I didn't know anything about her mother. Her mother was just a sacrifice.

I hadn't said goodbye to my parents.

"Why do you fight so hard for them?" I asked.

She stopped laughing and cocked her head. "They're my brothers."

"I know," I sighed. "But they can protect themselves."

"Yeah, they can." It looked like she sobered up a little at that thought. "Now."

She wouldn't meet my gaze. I felt the warmth in my chest die a little. Now they could protect themselves, but once upon a time they couldn't. I almost cursed myself for not thinking before asking that question. Her father had sentenced their mother to death, used his own son to house a demon. He had destroyed their family while it was still forming, and I couldn't picture him being a kind and caring father to Temari or Kankurou.

"Your father..." The words died on my lips at the look she gave me. I had never seen her look like that. Angry I was used to. But this was more like... grief.

"I don't want to talk about it. What's important is now, and now I can protect them."

After all these years, years of wishing she was easier to read, all it took was half a bottle of sake. Half a bottle of sake to start chipping at that armour she wore just like her brother. And just as I had suspected, what was inside her shell was broken.

She laughed, a bitter laugh and shook her head like she was trying to rid herself of something. "So now you know why I'm here."

"It's not so stupid," I shrugged. I didn't know how she was feeling. I didn't have very much to be bitter about.

"I didn't say it was," her tone was sharp. It made me chuckle.

"You were thinking it."

She nodded, agreeing with me. I locked eyes with her. She was beautiful in moonlight. "And what about you, Nara? Why are you here?"

I didn't know how to tell her. I had been avoiding that question in my own mind, and now it was out in the open it was even more daunting. She needed help, I'm a ninja, wasn't that reason enough? No, not really. She hadn't logged a mission, she hadn't even asked for help. I had just known what she was going to do, and couldn't bring myself to think what her dead body would look like when it was brought back into town. Temari's funeral? When it happened, I didn't want to see it.

I let the sake work its magic and held down the fear as I reached over and took her hand. Her breathing hitched, but she didn't resist. Her hand felt like it would burn mine.

"I'm here..." Her eyes were so green, my voice wasn't coming out right. "Because I'm afraid of getting hurt."

Her lips were parted, they looked so good. I felt that tingle I'd felt three years ago. She didn't look away, she was so fearless, unflinching. So beautiful. This time I wasn't going to let her make the move. I wanted to be strong for her.

I tugged on her hand, pulling her closer. She didn't speak, just rolled towards me, meeting me shoulder to shoulder. Her knees touched mine and a shiver ran down my spine. I wanted to pull her closer, I wanted her pressed flush against me, but I held back. It wasn't the time.

This was exactly what I'd sworn off.

My lips touched hers gently. She tasted so good. Sake, cigarettes and Temari. I drew out the kiss, biting her upper lip softly. Her body tensed ever so slightly, her hips pushing just half an inch closer to mine. My tongue brushed across hers. Was that... did she just whimper?

I wanted to take it slow, I really did. This was the only time I would ever have to just enjoy her touch and her taste, I wanted it to last forever. But that sound lit a fire at the base of my spine that spread too quickly. My arms wrapped around her, dragging her closer, pulling the kiss deeper. Her body responded, arching against mine.

That mesh she wore under her dress was tantalising me, teasing me with her almost bare shoulders that I wanted to touch. I wanted it off, I wanted nothing but smooth skin. Nothing but her. I tried to take a breath to calm myself, but it wouldn't come, my chest was too tight. I begged Kami for calm, for restraint.

Temari grabbed my left hand and guided it down onto her hip. This was not what I had prayed for. My hands trembled as I felt her curves under my fingers. My body wasn't responding to my orders, only to hers. She pressed her hips forward and mine followed, her hands on my shoulders, my back, drove my own forward, the delicate arch of her neck begged for my kiss and I could do nothing to stop it.

She didn't moan, she didn't squeal, all I could hear was her gasping for air, like she was suffocating. I was, too. She was stunning, everything I'd looked at for years was only more real to the touch.

Suddenly I was on my back. The shape of her face and her hair was silhouetted against the night sky, looking down at me. The look on her face was one of pure desperation. She slipped her hands under my vest and I leaned up to let her pull it off my shoulders. My shirt followed.

No, no, this wasn't how I wanted this. I'd thought about it, I'd dreamed about it, never like this. Never with tears glistening in her eyes, never on the cold, hard ground, never out of fear or regret. Her mouth smothered my protest.

Her dress fell to the ground and my objections died. She glowed in the moonlight, an expanse of perfect, smooth skin. She was all curves and softness. She had a tattoo on the sweet spot of her hip. _Sister. _I could see the scars that had saved my life, my fingertips reaching up to brush them.

Lightning ran through my veins as I looked at her. Kami, she was still wearing her leggings. My heart pounded in my ears. She was undoing my pants as I lay back, helpless against myself.

Her rhythm was slow and heavy, she drew a groan from my throat. She set the pace and I followed. It was rough, almost painful, everything about her was and I wanted it to hurt as she rocked her hips against mine. Her eyes were delirious, she had lost control before I had. Like everything else for her, this was a race, a mission, I could see it in her face. I didn't care, I didn't want to fix her, not tonight. Tonight I just wanted to scratch her itch. I wanted my beautiful, damaged Temari exactly as she was.

I couldn't take it, I needed to feel her against me. My arms wrapped around her and I eased her onto her back. Finally, all that flawless skin was pressed against my chest. The monster that ached in my chest was purring. It felt so good.

Now I was setting the pace, and she started moaning. The noise sent shocks through me, every groan pushing me closer. I wanted her so much, I wanted this for her. I wanted her to feel everything I felt, I wanted to tell her how much I needed her. All I could think, pushing me faster, driving me harder, was how I'd miss her. She needed to know that, in my mind at least, the next day would bring the loss of something so precious. Something that couldn't be replaced.

The things I wanted to tell her were so fast and so numerous that my lips trembled, the only thing escaping was her name, muffled against her neck. My body trembled above her, I couldn't get close enough, couldn't say enough. It was going to drive me insane.

Our bodies were setting the beat together now. One of her legs wrapped over my hips, the other tangling with mine. I clasped her hand in mine, my body felt weightless, like I was flying. She was begging me not to stop, and I couldn't have even tried. Everything around us was gone, my whole world was her, her face, her hips, our rhythm.

She started crying out and I knew she was close. It was the most intoxicating sound I had ever heard. The sensations hit me, wave after wave, I felt myself lose control. I had to keep the rhythm going.

Suddenly, she screamed, her legs locking around my hips, nails digging painfully into my back. Tears slid down her cheeks. The feeling struck all along my spine, I gasped for air. My face was buried in her neck as a groan escaped me. I crushed her in my arms, our bodies shaking.

We didn't move, clinging to each other, waiting for our breath to return. It felt like hours before my heart slowed down.

Temari let out a barking laugh, the kind of laugh that escapes after a near death experience. She looked like she had just been hit by a truck. Her hair was wild, her face flushed. I had never seen her more beautiful.

I tried to roll off her gracefully, but all the strength was sapped from me. I flopped down beside her and she rolled into my arms without hesitation. She yawned sleepily.

I was tired too, and I knew that she didn't want to talk. I didn't want to sleep yet though. I kept my eyes open, watching her as she nuzzled into my chest, finding a comfortable position.

As she closed her eyes, her face was lit with her perfect smile. And this time, it was just for me.

--


	13. A Synthetic Tessen

"_Nara, situations change. Tensions are running high between all the hidden villages. We have places where you're needed more."_

"_This is my home."_

"_Once this is over, I'm giving you a new assignment. You'll be able to visit this village, but I want you on the field more often." She stood up, turning to face the window. "You're going to be part of a new taskforce. The Kazekage has requested this of me."_

_I gulped, looking down at the Hokage. My heart skipped a beat._

"_I can't leave this village, I have responsibilities here. I can't just leave my family, my friends."_

"_Nara, you won't see her again." Her voice was nonchalant, but her expression serious. "I don't want you here waiting for her like a lovesick puppy every time she visits. This has gone far enough."_

"_You can't do this."_

"_Gaara has asked it of me, Temari is as hopeless as you, it seems."_

_--_

"Take off your shoes."

He looked at me as if I had lost my mind. I liked that look. I sat down and started undoing my sandals. He sat down next to me and followed suit.

We were sitting at our planned ambush site. The Raikage would pass through this point in fifteen minutes, and we would be ready for him. Four guards and one legendary ninja. How hard could it be?

Too hard for two jounin.

I tossed my shoes in a heap with my pack, my forehead protector followed. He didn't need to be told to get rid of his own.

"Your weapons, too." I flicked two kunai into my pile.

We hadn't talked much since the previous night. I didn't regret the sex, I don't think he did either. But it was more than a little awkward now that he'd seen me naked and screaming and doing a number of other compromising things. We were just friends, just... good friends. Friends should see each others' orgasm face.

"Wow, fighting will be so easy now that I'm not weighed down by all these weapons."

I smirked, that tone of voice was my favourite. "Don't tell me that you haven't heard of the Raikage's bloodline limit."

He looked at me closely, his eyes narrowing seriously. "Tell me."

Hah. That would figure. Everyone in Sunagakure knew of this limit, it was infamous for being so like the Third's Iron Sand. "His bloodline limit is the combination of lightning and earth elements. He can create violent magnetic fields, and even call lightning down from the sky."

He tossed his weapons on the ground, frustrated. "You could have told me that before now."

"Why? So you could pack your plastic shuriken?"

"What about your tessen?"

"You think I was issued with a metal tessen to fight him with?" I drew my black fan, tossing it to him with one hand so that he could feel how light the wooden version was.

He nodded solemnly and passed it back. He was being quiet, almost depressed. He was thinking, I knew that much. Probably about fighting without weapons. He had his shadow strangulation, I had my wooden tessen, we would do our best.

I felt the touch of a massive chakra in the distance and a pit of fear formed in my stomach. He was here. The Raikage would slaughter us both.

"He'll be here soon."

"I know."

Why did Shikamaru have to drag himself into this? I shook the thought off. We needed to focus. Maybe between the two of us we could at least injure him, make his bargaining position weaker. A weak Kage was an invitation to attack, so if we could just weaken him, he'd be forced to accept the conditions of Sunas' surrender, including Kankurou's return.

We had the plan all set out. Well, we had the engagement set out. Once we learned the abilities of his guards we'd have to play it by ear. He'd take the close range, I'd hang back. The Raikage would stay out of the way until his guards looked to be in trouble, so we'd have to finish it quickly at that point, and move onto the kage himself.

Shikamaru nodded to me in silence and crossed the road. The terrain was flat, full of trees. They wouldn't be able to gain the higher ground advantage, and I could level the trees if they decided to hide. The shadows from the forest gave Shikamaru plenty of room to move. There were no obvious mineral reefs in the area for the Raikage to use against us. It was as good as we could hope for.

I watched him slide up into the trees, out of sight but his chakra still as bright as day to me.

Now I could hear the footsteps of five men. They seemed too loud, I felt my anger rising. I knew I couldn't stop it, so I tried to control it, channel it. Heightened emotions meant faster reaction time, more chakra, greater speed. Anger was good.

They would notice us in approximately 30 seconds. At that point we would have to move towards them quickly. They wouldn't back down, but the attack would need to maintain its shock value to be worth anything. It was hard work ambushing a ninja.

The trees were dead still on the other side of the road, but I could feel him starting to move. I gritted my teeth and began carving my own path forward.

I could see them through the trees ahead. As I had thought, they were now standing still, aware of the attack, but probably unsure of which direction or the number of attackers. The guards had formed a swatika formation around the Raikage.

I trusted Shikamaru to do his job. First mine was to distract them.

I burst from the trees, tessen spread. It was time. All five heads turned my way. "Cutting whirlwind!"

The five ninja tried to dodge, but they couldn't. The whirlwind struck them where they stood, locked in place by a shadow they hadn't noticed. Their clothes tore, blood spurted and dust storm covered them. A decent start.

Shikamaru was being careful, with this strategy, I knew it. He had tried to impress upon me the importance of letting them start the real offensive, not locking them into a defensive position. He had some complex reasoning behind it that I had been too distracted to really listen to, but I carefully measured my chakra, making sure they would only be ruffled by the wind.

The dust settled, and I surveyed the damage. Four dishevelled nin looked back at me, but the Raikage himself was trapped in a heavy metal shield, a glistening egg in the middle of the road. Impervious to both wind and shadow.

I jumped down onto the road, where Shikamaru joined me, forcing all the nin to leap and whirl in midair, hopping six feet to their left. We stood their, waiting for the effect to sink in.

"Raikage," I announced. "You have my brother."

A thick chuckle filtered through the air. He wasn't coming out of his shell, but at least he could hear us. "Do I? I suppose you want him back."

I had never felt so stupid, but Shikamaru's plan was the one that would work. I needed to do some grandstanding. Overconfidence, I was going for overconfidence. "Give back my brother and we will not hurt you."

"Oh, I think we can make an arrangement." His voice was so cold. "Give me back my son and you can have your brother back."

I sucked in a deep breath. I had known that was coming, but it still hit hard. I still had nightmares.

"I'll ask you one more time." I stepped forward boldly. "Give back Sabaku no Kankurou."

"Let me know when they're dead," the Raikage's voice drifted out lazily.

While I had been speaking Shikamaru had been filtering his chakra back, soon the guards would break free. He had grown so strong. When he had first become a jounin he couldn't have held four other jounin at all, let alone had to hold back his full strength. If he had done it right, they would believe he hadn't weakened it at all, that they were able to break out of it at full strength. He wouldn't have been able to hold it long anyway.

Sure enough, the first one started to grunt with effort. The look of shock on Shikamaru's face was so convincing that I hesitated, unsure if he had really lost the jutsu earlier than he'd meant to. No, no, this was pat of the plan. He was conserving chakra.

I held my tessen aloft, ready to swing at any moment.

One of the guards broke free with a roar and charged forward. I sent a gust knocking him backwards. No taijutsu. Not yet. The others were slowly pulling away from the shadows. I kept them at bay gently, making sure they would open how we wanted them to.

"Earth jutsu, great quake!" Success.

I leapt into the air, falling back to where the ground wasn't crumbling. The jutsu shouts came quickly, my feet were in the air, trying to protect and dodge. Earth, fire, water, they sprung from the ground. One of the guards had not moved, probably a taijutsu master looking for his opening.

Shikamaru and I had been pushed back twenty feet, that was okay. I looked at him, catching his gaze. We nodded in silent agreement. Exactly as he had said it would be. Now we just needed to seperate them.

I let Shikamaru dart forward, and swept my fan after him. Three kunai soared at his pace, barely dodged by the fire user. The firenin turned his eyes on me. I narrowed my eyes and smirked. Perfect. I slid sideways, under the burst of flame I had expected. He was mine, now for the taijutsu user.

The firenin was trying to close the distance. This was the hard part. Shikamaru had the water and earth nin on him, flicking his shadows between them, keeping them focussed. _Come on, come on._ My weapon summoning was severely limitted, this needed to be inventive. I needed that nin.

Flames were exploding around me, my tessen fanning the fire away. I pressed forward, face first, trying to get up my speed despite the wind resistance. The tainin took up a defensive stance, expecting the brush of my fan. I held the tessen upright like a wide crest. One hit was all it would take to get him onto me. My arms tensed, and he prepared to avoid the blow, his gaze flicking to my shadow-using partner. I grinned viciously at him, the distance between us gone.

I slammed headfirst into his stomach, fan still upright.

He flew backward. That really hurt both of us. I didn't stop my movement, bringing my tessen forward, blowing him across the ground.

I stood back, letting him recompose and regroup with the firenin. I held my fan aloft, my eyes narrowed. This was about to get good. They started to confer. Oh no, they could not be allowed to coordinate.

"Great sickling wind!"

The trees in front of me collapsed, blown away chunk by chunk. The two nin shielded themselves, looking up at me, preparing to strike. The tainin launched forward, he was fast, too fast for me to push back. I couldn't shield myself with a wooden fan, so I jumped away. A fireball caught me and I hissed. My hair was not getting another new style.

I threw the fire back at him with my fan. It spread like a high speed crash, a long line of fire tearing through the forest. It didn't take long for him to recover and we faced again, a gust of wind halting the tainin's next attack.

I needed to cool down, I was revealing too much, too soon. Their attacks were getting stronger. Not good.

"Cutting whirlwind!" Another measured wind. Nothing too heavy. I needed them to dodge or withstand, but recover fast. They'd never reach me if they were both facing me from the same direction. They needed to figure that out.

I shielded and stole a glance at Shikamaru. My eyes widened and I nearly forgot to dodge as the tainin brought forward a barrage of hits. My body wasn't reacting quick enough. He was good. I was just blown away by what I had seen.

A knee slammed into my chest and I flew back, spinning in the air to land on my feet. I felt blood on my lips. Shikamaru had the waternin and the earthnin both trapped, his flickering shadow controlling both of them simultaneously. In different movements. That was way, way beyond shadow imitation. Damn.

I needed to speed this up.

I ran up the nearest tree, putting myself above my opponents. _Come on, get the clue._ I needed one on either side of the branch. They needed to seperate.

I smirked as the tainin swept sidewards. Perfect.

"Are you ready?" I asked. I tore the skin on my thumb with my teeth, spreading it across my fan. They took up their stances, waiting to withstand the gust, but this was not the jutsu to try to stand through.

"Cutting vortex!"

I held the tessen high above my head and focussed all of my chakra into my feet. Then I started to rotate, first my toes, then the air around them, then around that, two conflicting currents forming increasing circles around me. I pushed the power up, focussing everything I had into the air. The vortex picked up in speed. The tree I stood on started to shake.

The branch underneath me gave way, but I didn't let my body move, enduring the shock as my feet hit the ground. I could hear the nin trying to run, but they had waited too late. I heard their screams.

The wind around me tore everything in its path, like a million knives slicing their surroundings to shreds. I opened my eyes to see the tempest I was creating. The wind shrieked in my ears, the earth around me torn and thrown into the air. I could see the two nin being tossed through the storm, their blood pouring to mix with the air, their bodies lifted from the ground.

My tessen snapped closed, forced inwards. The screaming had stopped, the wind's howl all I could hear.

I let the vortex slowly subside. A dozen branches crashed to the ground, I was covered in a confetti of leaves, and the bodies of the guards were barely recognisable.

I smirked, and turned to see how Shikamaru was doing.

I jumped, his eyes were already on me. He was leaning against a tree thirty feet away. Two more bodies lay, lifeless, on the ground not far from him.

"I knew you could outsmart them, Nara-kun," I said, my eyebrows brushing my hairline. "I didn't know you could actually beat them in a fight." _Before me._

"Thanks," he said with a smirk. "I see you've picked up a new technique."

"I had to sacrifice thirty virgins for it." I couldn't imagine why we were joking. We were halfway there, now it was time to die. I had used too much chakra with that technique.

We strolled back toward the metal egg that held our target. He reached over and grabbed my hand. He hadn't even broken a sweat. He stopped me walking. Our eyes met.

"I'll miss you." The tone of his voice made my chest squeeze.

"I'll miss you, too," I felt my face grow hot. He leaned down and kissed me gently, my eyes closed.

We didn't say goodbye.

"Perfect." The voice surprised me. I hadn't noticed the iron shield melt. His casual tone was gone, now pure bitterness and hatred played across his face. "What a perfect situation."

I dropped Shikamaru's hand and spread my tessen, ready to dodge at any second. The Raikage didn't move. His eyes were piercing me.

"Do you think I'm a fool?" he asked rhetorically. "Did you really think that I would fall for your plan to pretend to be weak?"

_Good one, Shikamaru._ I shot him a glare.

"No, I know who you are." His voice was so bitter that it sent a shudder down my spine. I kept my face impassive. "If your little brother wasn't Kazekage, you probably would be. Gaara's attack killed my son, my only son."

He took a step forward, lightning began to crackle on his fingertips.

"Now I don't just get to kill the puppeteer, but also Sabaku no Temari." His eyes fixed on Shikamaru. "And her lover."

I crouched down. Shikamaru took a similar stance.

Like staring at an oncoming kunai, we both faced forward to the Fifth Raikage.

--


	14. A Rogue Kage

--

"_Nara, situations change. Tensions are running high between all the hidden villages. We have places where you're needed more."_

"_This is my home."_

"_Once this is over, I'm giving you a new assignment. You'll be able to visit this village, but I want you on the field more often." She stood up, turning to face the window. "You're going to be part of a new taskforce, stationed in Suna as part of our alliance. The Kazekage has requested this of me, he's impressed by your skills."_

_I gulped, looking down at the Hokage. My heart skipped a beat._

"_I can't leave this village, I have responsibilities here. I can't just leave my family, my friends."_

"_Nara, you won't see her again if you don't accept this offer." Her voice was nonchalant, but her expression serious. "I don't want you here waiting for her like a lovesick puppy every time she visits. This has gone far enough, everyone in the village knows what's going on. This is your chance to be with her."_

"_I... I know, but there are people here who need me. You can't do this."_

"_Gaara has asked it of me, Temari is as hopeless as you, it seems. You both need to be put out of your misery."_

"_I can't leave Konoha." My heart broke to say it._

_She looked up at me, her eyebrows raised. "Can I take this as your final answer?"_

--

I stepped forward. Temari needed to get back, we had this sorted. Long range, short range. I was glad for the plan, I wanted to put myself between her and the kage. She wasn't moving. I shot her a glare, she needed to move.

Temari's eyes were slits of rage, she spread her tessen, presenting it behind her back. I knew that stance. She was preparing to attack. Did she even remember the plan?

"You are not going to kill them," her voice was almost a growl. Her knees were shaking. My eyes widened. I had never seen her so angry. "You can kill me, but Kankarou and Shikamaru _will_ walk away."

"Temari, stick to the plan," I stated, keeping my voice calm and loud. It didn't work, her feet were dug into the ground, she was making her stand. The Raikage was no better, his back hunched, preparing to draw his blade.

This was not going to be pretty.

"After I'm done with you," the Raikage snarled, "I'm going to hunt down Gaara. This is the end of your bloodline."

Temari swooped forward, her fan swung out. The Raikage easily dodged her blow, the wind barely missing his hair, his hand striking forward.

The counterblow caught her in the side and she cried out. Her hair stood on end, there was a hole in her dress, the flesh underneath scarred. She leapt back, the smell of charred flesh following her. The soles of her bare feet were smoking.

"No shoes," the Raikage observed. "Smart."

I understood. His hits were charged with lightning, taking off our shoes let the electricity pass through us into the ground with only superficial damage. She would probably have died if she wasn't grounded.

I needed to stop this, she was acting through anger. She would lose.

"Shadow possession technique!" I performed the seals, sending my shadow toward our opponent. He jumped back, darting faster than I could chase. It didn't matter, he wasn't heading toward Temari. She needed time to get it together, get back to the plan.

My shadow backed off. If I caught him she'd think she had an opening, but not with this man. He'd step out of a basic shadow in seconds. My basic moves were all useless. Maybe a great shadow bind, or a flicker jutsu, but that would sap most of my chakra, I needed to wait until the right time.

"Temari, stick to the plan," I hissed. She really needed to sort herself out. Her eyes hit me, anger boiling behind them. "He wants you angry. We know how to win this."

She nodded slowly. Good, she was still thinking. She walked backwards, increasing the distance. Just as we had planned. The Raikage was now focussed on me.

"Good," he sneered, "I wanted her to watch you die first, anyway."

The Speech of Certain Victory. How I had missed it.

I didn't waste time replying. I needed to see some of that massive chakra. He was taking a defensive position, this was what I had been trying to avoid. Now we'd have to expend our own chakra engaging him, and he had a lot more to waste than we did. Something big and flashy should see him retaliate.

"Greater sunlight bind!" I closed my eyes, trying to focus on the sunlight. This was easier during the day, but still a lot of work. The air around me started rippling. The heat from the sun intesified and I focussed my chakra.

The light was burning now. I heard the Raikage choke, I had caught him. I opened my eyes to the illuminated clearing. The Raikage was bound into place, cords of light wrapping around him, compressing him. If I had a kunai I would have finished him.

Temari hauled toward him, shocking him with bouts of sickling wind. His clothes tore under the light strands. He grunted in pain. Maybe not pain.

"Light prison!" He didn't even move, just hissed the words at me and I knew it was coming. My jutsu broke as I looked upwards. Bars of pure light surrounded me, stretching up as far as I could see. They were kind of a blue colour. Kind of... pretty. I reached out.

"Shikamaru!" Temari roared at me. "Don't touch them, they're lightning!"

My eyes widened. Lightning? Perfectly straight, constant lightning. The ability to call lightning down from the sky. Half of his bloodline limit. Impressive.

I looked over at Temari. It was up to her for now. She needed to get this moving again. It was under control.

This time the wind dance that struck him was harder. It was unavoidable, the best thing about Temari's moves, and it wreaked havoc on the forest, tearing up the trees and the ground. Wind was a powerful element. The Raikage didn't fall back, withstanding the wind.

I tried to warn her as his hands gestured, but there was no time. Instantly three metal spikes shot from the ground. Temari tried to leap back, but she was too slow. One of the spikes slashed across her leg, leaving a trail of blood across the ground.

The metal warped and chased, three spikes turning into nine, into twenty-seven, like a hydra it kept multiplying. Temari was on the move, feet barely touching the ground, trying desperately to dodge the snakes that pursued her. They were too many and too fast. She would be missing her iron tessen.

Lightning couldn't stop shadows, I could disrupt this.

I tried to mimic his jutsu, my shadow sewing leaping from the ground, splitting in threes again and again. Now I had him on the defensive, his metal jutsu sucked back into the ground.

"Shikamaru, you fucking fool!" Temari could take time out from anything to yell at me. But as the Raikage turned to me, I saw my mistake. A metal shield shot from the earth, my shadows bouncing harmlessly off the surface. And I couldn't move to dodge his attack.

Two spikes flew from his palms, straight towards me. If I moved I would be cut to pieces by my lightning prison. My eyes widened as the inevitable faced me.

The spikes hit, blood began to gush, the lightning around me crackled, smoke and dust filled the air. I choked, but couldn't feel the pain. That wasn't right.

The dust began to settle and a gasp echoed between the Raikage and I. Standing between us, Temari's hands were bleeding as she held the spikes back. Every vein in her arms was raised, she was grunting with effort. The steel bars bent under her hold, she hauled them downwards, straining to change their path.

Her hair had fallen from one of her ponytails, her face spattered with blood, she looked dishevelled and filthy. My beautiful, untamed princess glared at me.

"I thought," she gasped under the effort, "that you were supposed to be fucking smart."

--

My hands hurt. Badly.

I felt like the spikes I was holding would crush me given half a chance. Shikamaru needed to get free before I lost control. I could only hold on for so long, and when I let go the spikes would follow their planned path, straight through his vital organs.

There was nothing that would stop the lightning prison though, and it looked as if the Raikage could hold it without even trying. Perhaps I could talk him into releasing it, I smirked. Fuck Shikamaru for getting me into this. There was just one way I could think of to get the required results.

I let my anger build my strength, then pulled as hard as I could. The spikes barely bent, but they bent. I pulled forward. The bars stretched. I grunted fom the effort, pulling, pushing, straining, dragging that metal forward. Just a bit further.

"Are you ready, Raikage-sama?" I asked, gasping for air, but continuing my efforts. I worked those spikes toward shikamaru. "Are you ready to die?"

I heard a grunt of shock as he realised what I was doing. He tried to pull the metal from my grip, but it wasn't going anywhere. The pain sucked the breath out of me. But I only needed a few more inches.

"You're bluffing," he said, not sounding very confident. He was still fighting against me with his magnetics. "You'd kill yourself, too."

"That's exactly why I'm not bluffing, Raikage," I roared from the effort, so close. "I never expected to walk away from this fight. I never even expected to kill you."

"Temari, stop!" I ignored Shikamaru's plea. I was playing chicken and there was no way to lose.

I screamed, pushing the last half inch forward.

The lightning prison was gone instantly, a millisecond before it would have hit the metal, electrocuting the Raikage and I simultaneously. Shikamaru was gone, flitting backwards to safety. I let the spikes go, they flew into empty space.

I fell to my knees. My arms felt like they were about to fall off. It was up to him for now.

His shadows moved forward, flickering strangely. This was the technique I had seen before. The Raikage dodged easily, moving back along the road. If he had seen what I had, he wouldn't be so confident. Shikamaru wasn't using his full speed with the shadow.

"Temari," he said as he dawdled after the kage, "I'll need your help for this. Can you manage one more wind vortex?"

Was he insane? Hed he not seen what I just did? I tried to focus on the question. I had enough chakra. Just enough. "One more."

"You know what to do."

Shikamaru's shadow snapped forward, picking up the speed and capturing the off guard Raikage. It wouldn't last long, I had to make my move quickly.

I sprinted forward, biting my thumb as I ran. I was next to the Raikage as I started the technique. In the central circles of my vortex even his metal shields would be torn apart. The flicker was getting weaker, I needed to start this fast.

"Great cutting vortex!"

I poured my chakra into the air, presenting my fan above my head. The currents started, thick and fast. Leaves were rising from the ground, the wind lifting them, tossing them between the two opposing streams.

Shikamaru's shadow finally flickered out, the Raikage surging toward me. But he was too late. The wind around me buffetted him into the larger currents. The ground underneath us was losing stability, the topsoil tossed into the air. I tried to push more chakra outwards, I needed this to be at full power.

The Raikage tried to push up a shield, but it melted as though in a furnace. His skin was starting to tear, the cutting wind making hundreds of tiny incisions. His feet were still on the ground, has face grim. The air started screaming.

Maybe... My chest tightened. For the first time, the thought actually crossed my mind that this could kill him. Maybe Shikamaru and I could win.

"It's not that easy!" The Raikage roared through the wind. I wanted to shield myself, I missed my iron tessen. He held his hands aloft in the wind, I felt the air crackle. From the ground rose three long poles of steel. They tore in the wind, but I realised too late that he had wanted that.

The vortex tore the poles into bullets, then sped them up. I watched, helpless, as my own wind jutsu hurled the deadly pellets toward me from all directions. I screamed as they hit, my vortex died, the Raikage thrown clear.

My stomach, legs, arms, neck, all down my back blood poured out freely.

"Temari!" Shikamaru's arms were around me, he was cradling my head. Why couldn't I move? I couldn't see properly either. It hurt so much. My whole body felt so weak. I needed to get up, I needed to save Kankurou. My job wasn't done here.

I felt the Raikage's shadow over us.

"It's time to finish this, Sabaku no-" His voice was cut off with a gurgling choke.

I looked up through blurry eyes. Sand?

"_Desert funeral."_

The sand compressed, my eyes widened. The Raikage's flesh oozed from cracks in his coccoon.

Shikamaru held me tighter, two deeply lined eyes stared down at me.

"How bad is it?" Gaara's soft voice helped to soothe the pain. He was here, my baby brother. My body began to relax. The Raikage was dead? It didn't seem possible. He was dead, and Shikamaru was alive. I had succeeded. I wasn't strong enough, but I had given Gaara the opening he needed.

"She's..." Shikamaru's voice wavered, "She's bleeding heavily. I don't think her vital organs were hit though."

My eyes closed, I wanted to sleep. I was suddenly so tired. I felt a hand strike my face. "Stay awake, you need to stay awake."

"You hit me..." That had sounded more eloquent in my head, but it came out as a childish grumble.

"And I'll do it again if you don't keep your eyes open," he hissed down at me. I felt myself lifted up in strong arms. I forced my eyes open. "We need to get her to the nearest medic."

"Gaara," I mumbled, trying to focus on him. "You came to kill him, too?"

The Kazekage's empty eyes fixed on me. I could see what no one else could, what lay behind those eyes. "Kankurou is my brother, too."

I sighed, relaxing back into Shikamaru's arms. I looked up at him. His face was grim. Why did he look so serious? We had won. He looked at Gaara and smirked.

"At least this time it wasn't your girlfriend trying to kill us."

Gaara paused, a light blush coloured his cheeks. _No one_ called Shiota his girlfriend. _Ever._ Then a small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. "She's not so bad, once you get to know her."

--


	15. A Chocolate Sarutobi

The light filtered into my hospital room, grey dawn. I was still aching from my iron shower, but the bullets had been successfully removed. I wanted to get out of this stupid hospital. Too much rest was making me lazy. I swung my bandaged legs over the side of the bed.

"You're not going anywhere."

A tendril of sand shoved me back into bed. Great, now I was stuck in a bed, and the bed was full of sand. I glared at Gaara. "We need to get back to Sunagakure."

"The council is taking care of Suna," Gaara took a seat next to the bed, letting his gourd sit on the ground. "Kankurou isn't ready to travel anyway."

I nodded solemnly. Kankurou had been returned, but not completely intact. He still needed a lot of medicine, surgery and time. Kumogakure's surrender had been unconditional.

Shikamaru had not been to visit me. I didn't often give in to self pity, but I felt more stupid with every second that passed. He was probably off being coddled by Ino-chan. We thought that we would die, of course we would act irrationally. I hadn't really thought...

"Are you and Nara-kun," Gaara paused. "Romantically involved?"

Stupid brother with his stupid mind reading. "Will you assassinate him if I say yes?"

"Maybe."

"He has a girlfriend, Gaara." I pushed my hair out of my face. "He came to save Kankurou because he was guilty about his strategy failing."

Gaara leaned back in his chair, looking lost in thought. What was up with him? It wasn't like it made any difference. "I was under the impression that you had feelings for him."

Gaara knew? Gaara was a complete emotional moron. If he knew then so did everyone else. Everyone in the village, probably in Suna, too, had watched me fall over myself for a guy as young as my baby brother, while he was busy with a much prettier girlfriend. Not that I had. He was just a friend. Just a friend I kept kissing. Just a friend who had seen me scream and beg for him.

I hadn't really expected...

A sob escaped my throat, completely unbidden. I tried to hold back the tears. I was crying over him? This wasn't me. He was just a friend...

Gaara sat next to me on the bed and let me hug him. He looked supremely uncomfortable. This wasn't really his area. It wasn't mine either. Was their some kind of protocol to follow for jilted lovers? We both knew protocol.

"Do you want me to kill him?" Gaara asked softly.

I laughed through my tears. "Would you?"

--

The dawn was cold. Autumn was creeping into Konoha.

I walked the streets, wanting to waste time. It was only another three hours until Temari left the village. I hadn't been to see her. I wanted to, but it was hard enough. If I saw her again I would be packing my bags for Suna in a heartbeat. And that was what I was trying to avoid.

It was the hardest thing I'd ever done. My dreams every night were of her, smiling, laughing, moaning. It was only by constantly distracting myself that I was able to stay away from the hospital. Also, I hadn't really expected to live long enough for Gaara to kill me for deflowering his sister. Fear was as good a distraction as any.

Well, technically, she had jumped on top of me, but I doubted that he would appreciate the subtle difference. I dug my nails into my palm, trying to stop thinking of her.

I had reached my destination. I knocked on Kurenai's door. She called out from inside.

I opened the door and instantly felt my leg caught by something. I looked down at the little mop of black hair. A grinning face turned up toward me. "Sika!"

I smiled, pulling the little girl into my arms. I carried her to the kitchen, I knew Kurenai would be waiting for me. Sure enough a mug of tea was already waiting for me. I sat across from her, letting her child down to the ground to continue playing.

"Good morning, Shikamaru," Kurenai smiled for me, her red eyes gleaming. "I'm glad you made time to come and see us, Godaime tells me you've been very busy."

"Yeah," I rubbed my neck. "It's been nonstop since Kumogakure surrendered."

And it wasn't like I was taking on as many jobs as I possibly could. Nothing like that.

"I found that very interesting," she said with a sly smirk, as if she knew something I didn't. "Since you usually put all your brainpower towards avoiding work, even at a time like this."

Oh, damn. What was this? I had walked into an ambush. As if I hadn't heard enough of this from my friends, telling me how strangely I was acting. "Konoha needs me right now."

"Of course." She sipped her tea, meeting my eyes evenly. Oh, she was going for the unintrusive approach. I was never going to hear the end of this, it was like everyone was trying to get rid of me. "Have you gone to visit her in the hospital?"

She knew about Temari? Of course, Tsunade knew. And women liked nothing more than to gossip. Soon Ino would find out and I wouldn't have to visit her at the hospital, I'd be sharing a room with her. "No."

Kurenai's eyes widened in anger. "You haven't..."

"She has her brothers there, she doesn't need me." I buried my nose in my tea, trying to avoid her stare. A genjutsu master staring would intimidate even a kage. She picked up her daughter, letting the little girl sit on her lap.

"Godaime told me that she offered you the chance to go to Suna as part of a special taskforce." Her voice was still calm and sweet. I could see what Asuma had loved about her, even when she was troublesome she seemed so innocuous.

Did she have to remind me? Did I really need another vision of Sunagakure, with an easy but important job and my Temari, waiting for me just out of reach? Did they all think that I hadn't imagined this a thousand times, and had to stop myself from running to Hokage, telling her that I'd changed my mind?

"It would be nice, but I have responsibilities here," I replied nonchalantly. Maybe I could get her off my back by mimicking her calm, detached tone.

She looked away, like she was trying to figure out how to word what she had to say. "Your responsibilities... This village..."

She was losing her cool. This was something I had become used to in her wildly hormonal months, but I hadn't seen it in a long time.

"I thought you were supposed to be smart," she huffed. I was getting that a lot lately.

"I promised Asuma-sensei-" I was cut off.

"Do you love her?"

_Love her? _I sat back, shocked. What was this talk about love? She wasn't even my girlfriend. She was just a friend. A friend I couldn't get out of my mind. A friend who was so pretty right after we made love that my heart broke just to see it. I sighed heavily.

"Yes."

She sipped her tea again, her composure returned. "Do you think Asuma would want this for you?"

I sat back, feeling like I'd been knocked around the head. Asuma wanted Kurenai and his daughter taken care of. He wanted the child to have a father figure. That what he wanted for his family. I didn't know what he wanted for me.

I thought back to how he looked at her before he had left the village for the last time. He watched her, the whole world gone from around him. I could see through his eyes now. He had seen what he wanted for himself in Kurenai. He had seen his future, her happiness, a reason to go through the trouble he went through every day.

My thoughts flicked back to when I fought the Raikage. Gaara had blushed. And smiled. _Gaara_ had blushed and smiled. When I called Shiota his girlfriend. He had found his mate, his reason, and it made even Gaara smile.

So why couldn't I smile? Why could I distract myself and stay away?

Did Asuma want me to lose my Kurenai for the sake of his?

My Temari. I was going to lose her. She would walk out of this village and I would never see her again. I'd hear about her being promoted, one day married, one day killed in battle. That would be our story.

I looked at Kurenai, my face contorted in shock. She smiled at me. "Go."

I swept her daughter into my arms for one more hug, holding her tightly for just a moment, before racing out the door toward the Hokage's office.

--

"Let's go already," I heard her huff. They were standing at the gates, as many Sunanin as had survived the initial battle. I walked down the streets, not wanting to hurry. I could see her face. She was staunch, emotionless.

"We still have one more coming," Gaara replied simply, his face giving away nothing.

She wasn't wearing her ANBU uniform, neither was Kankurou. They looked just like when I had first seen them. Only now I knew them. She didn't look so scary now. Gaara and Kankurou looked scarier.

"Wait up," I called toward them. Temari's head whipped toward me. She looked murderous.

"What are you doing here?" she asked me coldly. I hesitated. If she had changed her mind, I had just made the biggest mistake of my life.

"Didn't you hear?" I asked nonchalantly. "I'm stationed in Suna from now on."

The look of shock on her face was worth the wait. "What about Yamanaka-chan?"

I smiled at her. "Ino broke up with me two weeks ago. Said I was head over heels for someone else."

She looked up at me, stunned silent. I thought she was going to hurt me for a moment. Then her shoulders started to shake. I stepped forward to wrap my arms around her.

She didn't cry, but little hiccups escaped her throat as her eyes caught mine.

"You're going to be living in Suna?"

I smiled for her. Ignoring her brothers, I took her hand. I'd need some company, it was a long walk to Suna. She pulled away from me, regaining her composure, but kept her hold on my hand.

I knew starting again in a new place was going to be troublesome. Managing my own team would be troublesome. Missing my friends and family would be the worst. But I looked down at the impassive face of the girl next to me.

Temari was worth the trouble.

--

_**fin**_

--


End file.
